1066

The most important year in British history. After the death of Edward the confessor, three aristocracy of europe claimed the throne. Harold II had already taken the throne. His first opposition came from Viking warlord Harald Hadraada. The viking army was defeated without much hassle. William, duke of Normandy then came from France to the south coast. Harold II ploughed his army onto William's without rest. They made good time, but were exhausted. William used simple but effective maneuveres to kill off many thousands of English. Harold died during the battle, and William became William the conquerer. All monarchs since have been of his lineage. Also, there have been over 50 attempts to invade britain since that point, all of which have failed.



1066
1) An entertainment superstore, specifically Hastings, which contains new and used books, CD's, movies and novelty T-shirts which are usually next to trashy party/board games. An additional feature which a 1066 may or may not contain is a self-serve, "complimentary" coffee kiosk at 25 cents a cup, though it is usually referred to as "free" because very few people actually pay for it. Different varieties of coffee are featured each day, the most notorious being "Jamaican Me Crazy". In small college towns with little variety such as Auburn Alabama, a 1066 often become a strange and degenerate cultural nexus.

2) A disappointment, in reference to the chain of entertainment super stores.
Example:
1) "There's nothing to do in this godforsaken shit hole, let's go to 1066."

2) "This place looked promising on the outside, but it's really just an extremely limited selection of things on Amazon.com masquerading as a tantalizing local dive. Classic 1066 man..."


1066
Sexual act in reference to the Battle of Hastings, where a man shoots his 'load' onto a girls' eye(s), similar to Harold getting shot in the eye during the battle.
(Prounounced - Ten-Sixty-Six)
Example:
Person A: Did you knob that girl last night?

Person B: Yeah, I 1066'd her.


0800 00 1066
Phone number for HastingsDirect: A british car insurance company with a memorable advert of a seagull and statue discussing the benefits of the company before the seagull sings the catchy number in a made up tune with a noticeable gap between '0800' and '1066'.

Also used as a call and response method to find a british person in a foreign country. Simply shout 'oh eight hundred double oh' and wait for the responding '10 66' more than likely coming from the local pub or chippy. No proper british person can resist the urge to respond.

Warning: Catchy tune
Example:
0800 00 1066
*British lass/lad in foreign country*: 0800 00!!! *listens out*
*Random space in the crowd pint in hand*: 1066!!!


0800 00 1066
Words cannot adequately describe the total and unstoppable terror that fills the soul of any sane person upon noticing this number under a call screen. It's not a matter of IF the gull will come for you, but WHEN. Many a fool has tried to cheat their fate. Some have taken to avoiding all phones for as long as they live. Others have chosen to end their lives, quickly and on their own terms. But all is futile, as this will only make it turn to your loved ones. The best one can hope for is a prolonged and agonising death. Those it abducts are far less fortunate. For your own sake, under NO circumstances utter its summoning phrase.
Example:
Haha what a funny ad, oh eight hundred dou-
(horrifying screaming and dismembering sounds)

Oh my phone's ringing
(sees caller is 0800 00 1066)
May God have mercy upon us


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