Hipsters

Hipsters, like deep down, when you look past the clothes, the fashion sense, whatever, deep down they’re just critics. They’re critics of everything: critics of fashion, critics of art, and critics of movies. And it’s pretentious. And when it comes to music, they think that they are a big part of that culture and they feel like they are the voice for everybody else. And a lot of times they’re full of shit.



Hipsters
Such people are the true "cool cats" of the world. They're those "in the know", ahead of the norm. They're not of the mainstream. They be eternal beatniks! (And certainly not hippies). Yes, they're people who are-- or at least consider themselves to be-- "hip", as in "hip to the jive". Older hip hipsters will of course always look down on latter-day versions, those (younger) folks who think themselves to be hipsters simply because, for instance, they're able to exhibit a little facial peach-fuzz and have a taste for some generic pop music that they've deemed to be, umm, "non-corporate". Hah!
Example:
Hipsters, flipsters,
and finger-poppin' daddies:
Knock me your lobes.

This bit of hipsterism was written by "Lord Buckley" (Richard 'Lord' Buckley'), who was a singular, amazingly influencial (Caucasian!) comic genius that looked a little like Salvador Dali, affected a British accent, dressed in a tux and was best known as one who performed hipster interpretations/translations of well-known dramatic scenes and notable speeches.

The above quote comes from Lord Buckley's version of the very beginning of Mark Anthony's funeral oration in Shakespeare's Julius Caesar:

Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears;
I come to bury Caesar, not to praise him.
The evil that men do lives after them;
The good is oft interred with their bones...


Hipsters
Take the purest and simplest of things and transform them into an infernal tangle of complexity in order to call it their own.
Example:
I used to understand what beer (pizza, coffee, pâté, tea, pot, hash, a beard, soap etc) was until the Hipsters got their paws on it.


Hipsters
The blend of every failed fad since the early 1900s.
Example:
The hipsters in my town sport ironic mustachios and ride pink speed bikes to local coffee shops where they bust out their superior Macintosh laptops and give people disgusted looks who are not seen to be as ironic as themselves, concerning fashion.


Hipsters
The modern "hipster": You have up graded from a "scene kid" to a "hipster". Thrown out your band T-shirts and other neon shit and downed to v-necks, florals, cardigans, geeked up sweaters, and flannel; Making you believe you're the hippest piece of crap out there yet is not aware you're two years too late in the fashion scene. You exchanged your Cash Cash album for a Tegan and Sara one because they're so YOOOONIIICCCKKKKKK and no longer find Hot Topic your favourite store after discovering Urban Outfitters. Art suddenly inspires you, though you have no idea who in the world is Andy Warhol. Photography moves you, though you're moved by any photo that is converted in black and white because you have no creativity. Great job switching the genre of your social scene, you tool.
Example:
Person 1: Hey, you changed your style a lot.

Person 2: Yeah, I was all about the scene kid thing but now I'm totally all about the vintage and arts, I'm pretty hipster now. I've growned up a lot and more original, I started wearing these nerd glasses waaaay before everybody. Basically I'm no longer a kid, I've become way more mature in style, music, and mind.

Person 1: ..

Person 2: I even stopped listening to Breathe Carolina and stuff, I'm all about Phoenix, The Black Kids, MGMT, and other of that amazing stuff. Yah know hipsters are just way above scene kids, scene kids are just dumb as heck.

Person 1: ...LOLOLOLOLOL, disconnect the internet and go read a book dude.


Hipsters
People who have lots of money...Correction, people who have parents with lots of money. They go into "urban" Neighborhoods because they have culture and personality and the hipsters want to appear "hip" and "cool" to all of their rich friends. not really understanding that when they move in the rent goes up and the "average Joe's" have to move out. Sending the Average Joe's into a crime infested neighborhood. Hipsters usually walk around with their nose in the air thinking they are better than everybody assuming that all human beings are "puppets in a big puppet show" when really they are making themselves look even more vapid and clueless....Now due to the economy they are sucking the very tit of humanity they once looked down upon.
Example:
Average Joe: long day working at two jobs. Time to tuck the kids in and relax...

Note on the door: *rent went up. Now pay $1000*

Average Joe: What? how can this be? I can barely make rent now and I don't want to move into the ghetto. (turns head)

Hipster (sipping a latte chatting with rich friend): Well, I decided to move here because it has so much culture and the people here are my muse I mean, ever since I moved in I have just been creating art work after crappy art work! I certainly wouldn't have had any inspiration at 740 park avenue,Manhattan.

Average Joe: I don't understand. Those Hipsters can afford the most expensive Apartment building in New York, But they decide to move here?


Hipsters
Modern day hipsters are the counter-culture product of a belly full consuming materialistic society. We have no real social or political issues to revolt against; so they choose to revolt against the mainstream pop culture. *1* And with what again? Even more materialism and consumerism. *2*

Hipsters will enjoy a bunch of uninteresting "boring" things in an attempt to spite what they assume to be "sheeple". They turn neutral, once respected things into ridiculous holier than thou interests. Extreme examples turns into hilarity. *3* They will eventually suck the life out of anything that was once neutral.

A hipster is just as conforming as anybody, but then again, what part of youth isn't? Hipsters are no different than any other youth, Because take out the surface differences, the main reasons for such behavior is same as any; sex, vanity, social status, and substance abuse. Original "values" such as the pseudo "liberal independent thinking" have been destroyed by the vain parasites of the subculture. Stop fooling yourselves, there is nothing free thinking about (...) ; admit you like this band because it's indie (Not because it's original or "smart"), or wear this type of clothing just because nobody else does. Probably to look chic to others, ay? *4*

Like whatever pleases you; friendships are formed, not screened through like job applications.
Example:
1* Hipsters are a evolved version of resentment and social stigma. It's evolved however, so much; modern day hipsters are now a entirely new subculture of their own, Complete with specific trends and rules.

2* for example: Pop music, specific current fashions like mall clothing, etc are looked down upon as conformity. To "fight" such atrocities; hipsters desperately cling to their own trends, such as listening to extremely obscure music and buying only from specific labels.

3* *Hipster: "Yeah, I really enjoy (insert band)"
Someone: "You know... (insert band) promotes A LOT of (insert obvious human rights violations)...
Hipster: "Like you'd know! You just don't understand the complexity of them! You're just another close minded arrogant MTV loving conformist!"

**Most hipsters don't care to actually read real books; however since reading, philosophy, politics, what not is so "uncool" it's automatically a pseudo-interests, because the people who dislike such things are SUCH conforming robots of society!

4* The same things happen, random people hook up, people get their pictures taken by whatever paparazzi, we see if we recognize so and so who we heard some gossip about and look; there's some booze.


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