Ibe

a little BITCH



IB
The epitome of cruel and unusual torture, inflicted on young people between the ages of fifteen and eighteen, in which all moral and ethical codes are violated. This program, known formally as the International Baccalaureate, is designed to make these teenagers suffer as much as they can over the span of two years. The more miserable the students are, the more bonus points the IB gurus gain, and the more money is incremented int heir salaries. The instructors are cruel, uninterested in the well-being of the students; the coordinators are merciless in the strive to boost the GPA's of the students as high as they can go; the students themselves are nervous wrecks. Time is not the friend of these poor children, as they are not allowed any spare minutes to do normal activities other teenagers their ages do (i.e. going to the movies, parties, drinking, or attending other social events). They are shielded from the world in their little bubble of TOK, Chemistry, Biology, Photo, Psychology, American History, English, Spanish, French,German, Calculus, Physics, and MLA/APA in-text and extra textual citations. They have a notorious reputation to take illicit drugs in order to maintain concentration and memory. (otherwise known as potheads.) They also have a glorious reputation of being cheaters and liers. IB is in its simplest form a very accurate representation of Hell on Earth. It deprives its students of sleep, food, fun, rest, relaxation, and most of all, happiness and sanity. If an individual is able to complete the rigorous courses and receive their diploma, conserve their sanity, stay alive to receive said diploma, or abstain from committing murder or personal physical mutations, they shall be dubbed The Honorable One by the IB gods in Cardiff, Whales.
Example:
Example 1:
You know you're IB when you can't restrain yourself from relating international economics and politics to a simple conversation about cartoons.

Example 2:
Sleep and happiness: about the only words not part of the vocabulary of an IB students.

Example 3:
Ivy League schools: specially designed for IB kids.


IB
A.K.A. International Baccalaureate - A malicious program aimed at the unnaturally brighter population in an attempt to overload their brains, thus reducing them to vegetables without lives. However, a true IB student will respond by adapting and bsing their way through.
Example:
IB, therefore I BS.

IB - Teaching students how to turn shit into gold!


IB
The International Baccalaureate Diploma Programme (IB) is an education programme that genetically modifies its students to live without basic requirements and teaches the aesthetically pleasing art of Bullshit, through its ultimate arsenal of ToK, Extended Essay and CAS.

ToK is an extension of Language A1 class, where students are taught how to bullshit on for 10 pages about whether a pen is a pen or a pencil. The Extended Essay is a benchmark for a students' brainwashing stage. The instructions clearly states students choose a topic of their interest. Successful IB students should not have any interest by this stage. People who still have interest to write about will get an E, and therefore fail the IB. CAS is as close as students get to breathing fresh air and seeing flesh objects. In CAS, students donate their expendable blood, because its the least time consuming service they can offer without compromising study time. IB students also don't have time to make friends. Friends are ompetitors.

At the end of the 2 year IB course. Those who get above a 24 are successfully genetically modified, those who get below 24 do not fullfill the requirements and are obsolete.
Example:
Nurse: You again? This must be the 5th time you'v come here to donate blood
IB student: Yes it is. I need 50 service hours for IB.

Nurse: You need time for your blood cells...
IB student: Women I don't have time! There are couple more IB students lined up outside all for the same good CAS cause. Please be understanding

Nurse: I simply cannot allow you to...
IB student: The 45th student, please don't let him donate blood. He pulled out my USB without safety removal and he took advantage of shared wireless network to download my EE as i was writing it.

Nurse: Your what?
IB Student: Oh, Extended Essay, its just 4000 words of bullshit, much of it borrowed from a thesaurus.


IB
International Baccalaureate Program, a high school program for exceptionally gifted students, designed to transform once intelligent creative students into conformists of an international curriculum. This program is known for causing ridiculously high stress levels, mutual hatred and competition amongst it's students, repeated mental breakdowns, bloodshed, lack of a social life, and the mastery of bullshitting your way through things.

IB students are typically extremely masochistic and rarely sleep. It is also known to have made students who once felt quite smart to feel quite stupid, thus greatly lowering their self-esteems.

Another name for IB is hell.
Example:
Non-IB student: Hey you want to go hang out tonight?

IB student: Sorry, I can't. I have a chemistry formal report due tomorrow, I have to read about 100 pages for biology, read an entire Shakespeare play, write a research paper about Stalin, do an entire chapter of calculus, and volunteer for 8 hours too.

Non-IB student: Damn.


IB
Commonly thought to be a magnet program, International Baccalaureate is in reality a cleverly disguised plot implemented by Swiss lawn gnomes to steal the souls, sleep, and free wills of high school students. Pros include mad bs'ing skills.

Also see: Academic Suicide
Example:
I am, therefore I B
I B, therefore I stress
I stress, therefore IBS


IB
A dangerously fatal disease whose side effects include but are not limited to: A soulless existence, insomnia due to the persistent feeling of not having completely finished all work, a "brain-dead" state, a shattered self-esteem, a falsified interest in life as a result of TOK, an endless cycle of procrastination, which left untreated could lead to mental instability, insanity, or fatality.
Example:
"It was nice knowing Sujen," says Speaker 1
"The IB got the best of him...he fought so valiantly" says speaker 2
"He shall not be forgotten. May he rest in peace, and let the IB be eradicated before more perish" says speaker 3.


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