Jesus Christ Definition| Urban Word Dictionary

Jesus Christ

The name Bill Cosby thought was his growing up. He thought his brothers name was "God Dammit".According to Cosby's classic stand-up routine, his father would always yell at him and his brother. Something like: "Jesus Christ, it's raining, get in here. God Dammit, you get in here too.". But then one day he was playing in the yard alone and his father called him: "God Dammit, quit making such a racket!" Bill just stood there looking around for his brother. "God Dammit didn't you hear me?" yelled his father to which Bill replied, "But dad, I'm Jesus Christ!"

Jesus Christ

by JBurton31 on Apr 16, 2010 04:43:45

Who Bill Cosby thought he was from ages 7-15

Example:
"It was because of my father that from the ages of seven to fifteen, I thought that my name was Jesus Christ and my brother, Russell, thought that his name was Dammit. 'Dammit, will you stop all that noise?' And, 'Jesus Christ, sit down!' One day, I'm out playing in the rain, and my father yelled, 'Dammit will you get back in here!' I said, 'Dad, I'm Jesus Christ!'"

--Bill Cosby

Jesus Christ

by nethcev! on Sep 02, 2006 06:31:33

The “Prince of Peace” in whose name countless have been slaughtered.

Example:
Jesus Christ: the poem.

Jesus.
The savior.
The light of the world.
The big cheese up in the sky.
Who was nailed to a cross, so we wouldn’t die.

Jesus Christ

by Levi Hizzle on Aug 13, 2009 12:28:37

A cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father and can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree.

Example:
Damn, that guy Jesus Christ sure is bad-ass. He somehow managed to revive himself after being nailed to a giant board. Props, yo.

Jesus Christ

by skifreemt on Feb 26, 2010 08:48:33

Main character in the best selling fiction book of all time. Don't bother reading it though, he dies in the end.

Example:
I'm so bummed that Jesus Christ got killed off in the end of the Bible! But hey, they could totally make a killer zombie movie from his resurrection.

Jesus Christ

by runrobrun on Jul 23, 2011 23:27:07

A mythological creature to whom is attributed power to redeem man from eternal damnation as a consequence of sin. Born of man's need to believe in something, Christ is a useful tool for many things: keeping the gullible in line, raising money, imposing morals on others, justifying war, bloodshed, and terrorism, explaining away tragedies like childhood cancer and natural disaster, silencing dissent, and imposing guilt, are among the most popular miracles performed by Jesus.
Christ retains a strong following thousands of years after his invention, despite the advance of science, education, and technology in the years since.

Example:
Jesus Christ, almighty son of God, has all power in heaven and earth, except the power to grow a money tree.

Jesus Christ

by Doomester on Dec 27, 2018 01:53:42

Jesus Christ is a fictional character.
Associated with The Bibles(A Fictional Storybook) and Christianity.

Example:
Good morning kid, today we'll be learning about what Jesus Christ taught us in our life.

Jesus Christ

by HelloWorld121 on Jul 28, 2011 20:50:46

The protagonist in the best-selling fiction book of all time.

Spolier Alert: Jesus dies.

Also used as an exclamation of shock. It can be used with the conjuction of another word inserted between 'Jesus' and 'Christ'.

Example:
1) Reference to Bible

Pastor: So have you accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour?
Jessica: Oh wait, you mean that dude with the beard who's the main character in that popular bullshit book where magic happens? That one? Nah... did you hear I'm officially atheist?

2) - Shock

Ally: Did you hear Dan got into jail?
Ben: Jesus Christ! How the hell'd that happen!?

3) In conjuction with another word.

Tom: So what answer did you get for 5c on the maths homework?
Olly: Jesus rollerblading Christ, I forgot we had homework!
-----
Lolita: So... when's your birthday again?
Beth: Jesus fucking Christ Lolita, how many times do I have to tell you?

Jesus Christ

by XxXI.AM.NOT.AN.AETHEISTXxX on Apr 05, 2009 07:19:51

1. A word used to express anger. Avoid saying this in front of Jesus Freaks, it will upset them.

2. Some guy stated in the Bible. He supposedly died on a cross and died for our sins. Now he's gonna save us all or something like that. Of course we all know this is absolutely retarded, after all, the only reference is a really big book.

Example:
1. Jesus Christ, why the hell is my wife doing another man in my bed??

2. All the Bible is, is a big book, ok?? Who wrote the book? God? Ok. Yeah. God wrote the Bible and then came down to earth and gave it to some guy so he could show it to everyone. YEAH RIGHT. You know what really happened? Some guy wrote all this bull so that he could make some money.

And how come even in the Bible, men have all the power? I though "Jesus" believed in equality for everyone!! Wtf?

Tell you what, when Jesus "Saves" you, I want you to come down here with him and show me. THEN I'll believe it. Thank you.

Jesus Christ

by Jesus Himself on Apr 24, 2005 23:15:48

Interjection best used when in pain, surprise, or discontent. See also shit,holy shit.

Example:
Jesus Christ: I am your lord and savior. I have returned.
Person: Jesus Christ!

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