Skateboards

The act to refer to when trying to redirect attention from the fact that you're a cow.



Skateboard
The good ol' plank o' wood. A skateboard is NOT a toy; it's a part of your fucking life, bro. Cruise to school, bomb hills, haul ass, eat shit, and learn a thing or two from and on your board. A skateboard has always been there. Get on and forget all the bullshit; enjoy the ride. You CANNOT use a skateboard as a fashion sense; if you do, you're a shithead. Thrash everything in sight and ride until you die.
Example:
Fuck doing homework. I have my skateboard.
Fuck doing drugs. I have my skateboard.

Fuck all this bullshit. I have my skateboard.


Skateboarding
Stereo types aside, it's just a thing that some people like doing. Frowned upon by cops, business owners, and midle aged rich stuck up Bitchy women. You get kicked out of anywhere you can think off by just skating flatground.
Example:
HEY! THERES NO SKATEBOARDING HERE. YOUR DAMAGING THAT LEDGE!!!

But, we're skating flatground, though.

THATS IT, I'M CALLING THE POLICE!


skateboarding
Is a misunderstood artform/sport that is often critisized by the mainstream who do not grasp the concept. This is mainly due to the fact that there are no uniforms, rules, times etc. to clearly define the activity. Most people do not even understand how skaters 'ollie' their decks, and true to human nature they criticise what they cannot comprehend.

It is without a doubt far more skillful, creative and extreme than any team sport i can think of - and can only be compared to a select few of other sports/artforms such as surfing, snowboarding, even BMX.

Anyone can perform the most basic requirement of football - ie. kicking a stupid ball (or catching one).

Yet only a small minority of people will ever manage to perform the most basic requirement of skateboarding. ie. the 'ollie'. (Tip: its all about physics)

Due to the sports misconception, the real riders are mostly those who feel ill-at-ease with our conservative society, and feel the need to express themselves accordingly. This can admittedly result in the use of public property that is different to its intended purpose..

However, the greedy corporate fat cats have realised that there is potential cash in bottling this so-called teen-angst. As a result we have a whole pop-culture full of posers, companies, music groups and even shredders whose prime interest is gaining publicity, money and mainstream approval.

The soul riders are those individuals you will see milling around street corners, in dark crevices of the cityscape, wary of beefed-up security, all battle-scarred and torn, yet somewhat proud of our victimised counter-culture..

...Skateboarding is NOT: Tony Hawk games; World Industry clothing; Avril Laviegne; drug-using space-cadets.

...Skateboarding is: the underground; the artform; the family; the expression; the knocks and falls; the persistence; the reward...
Example:
I was skateboarding down the street before a cop pulled over and said "you cant ride on the street". So i skated down the path and i copped scowling stares from every direction - so i went down to the industrial estate and was confronted by a steroid wank of a security guard.

so i said 'fuck it' i'l just skate in your faces - just try and catch me..


Skateboard
A piece of wood with wheels and a simple turning system, that has the magical power to bring fun and pleasure to millions around the world. It also should be used for fun and not to look "cool".
Example:
guy one: "hey look at me I'm so cool, I'm carrying a skateboard, that must mean I am really adventurous and wild"

guy two: "you suck"


skateboarder
one who rides a skateboard and has fun doing it. skaters can be any kind of person; punk, prep, jock, criminal, nerd... whatever. skateboarding has room for all kinds of people, and most of us won't discriminate based on anything but your love for skateboarding.

however, since skateboarding has recently rocketed in popularity, it has now become 'cool'. so now, you have to deal with those who are only doing it to be 'cool'. these people are not really skateboarders.

if you are the other kind of skater (the for real one, and you know who you are) i have some words of wisdom for you. when you get kicked out of a skatespot, don't mouth off to the cops no matter how much of an idiot they really are. if skaters want to get accepted in todays world (which seems impossible right now) then we need to act like civilized people. if thats how we act, that's how we'll be treated, which means less getting kicked out of skate spots and more riding of the skateboard.
Example:
skateboarders are usually non-competative people, because competition in skateboarding is fairly low-key; its not really taken seriously. ESPN tried to make it into some dramatic rivalry between the top skaters when in fact they are all friends just goofing around. there's no hating.


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