Sunglasses

Sunglasses are a must if you want to look cool. The Bigger The Better. You can't go wrong with oversized plastic sunglasses.



Sunglasses
Nocturnal pseudo-prehistoric micro-animals which inhabit the icy bleak tundra of Siberia and several suburbs of Milan.

Used in sandwiches eaten by the Inuit.

Also the surname of the ever-smiling Peruvian soul singer of the seventies, Juan Carlos Sunglasses.
Example:
"You know Pekka, these sunglasses taste really great, we must eat them more often, really we must."


sunglasses
Plastic/metal/glass instruments placed over the eyes to block out harmful UV rays.

Celebrities use them to diguise themselves as normal people. Normal people use them to digsuise themselves as celebrities.
Example:
"Check out the new sunglasses I bought! They protect my eyes while making myself appear to be rich."


sunglasses
dark shaded coverings for your eyes so you can look at women on the beach without them knowing.
Example:
She came over and slaped me 'cause I got too caught up to remember not to turn my head!


sunglasses
Dark-tinted glasses, worn for a variety of reasons.
1: If it's a bright day.
2: If you have been given a black eye and want to conceal it.
3: You are making a (not-very-good) attempt to conceal your identity.
4: You are a complete tit who thinks wearing sunglasses makes you look like a gangster or a pop star or something.
Example:
"Why does Sunglasses Roy wear shades even when it's dark? Does he think it's cool?"

"Er, no. He's actually an alien with red eyes and doesn't want anyone to see them".


Sunglassed
The adjective to describe the behaviour one uses towards another that best resembles between 'fuck you' and 'deal with it'.
When someone gives you that smirk of 'deal with it' , you'll know it.
Can also be expressed using the 'sunglasses emoji'.
Example:
Me: 'Today I worked overtime coz I was piled with tasks and my co-worker knew well about it, but didn't help and instead finished earlier to get home.'

My mate: 'You just got sunglassed!

Me:' I what?'


sunglasses-warrior
A pejorative term for someone who tries too hard to aggressively assert their coolness, their detachment, their apathy. Someone who is happy to point out the hopelessness of problems, and unwilling to put work into fixing them.
Example:
"Who cares? Everyone has known this forever. There is nothing we can do."
"Ooh, cool. You're a sunglasses-warrior. I'm so impressed with how jaded you are."


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