Thanksgiving

A holiday in November that takes place in the United States where everything is closed for people to sit down and watch football and eat turkey, followed by Black Friday, a holiday to physically fight people over discounts and max out their credit cards to buy gifts for Christmas.



Thanksgiving
That day where your relatives come over. The relatives are usually split into 2 groups. The adults usually sit in the living room and get into fights about politics and get mad is you interrupt their “really important” conversation.
The kids go upstairs and either whine because they think they have the right to all your things just because they’re guests, or the teenagers stick their butts in your house and think they’re the boss because they’re “ThE OlDeSt”.
when it is time for food, your adult relatives are all up in your business, or forgot you were born. When it is time to leave, your parents expect you to go and clean up everybody’s freaking mess. then they go and start hounding you on if that cousin you saw once is now your new best friend.
Example:
“Dude, are you excited for thanksgiving?”
No, my teenage cousins are coming to our house.”


Thanksgiving
To use your cum, shit, piss, and vomit to stuff a turducken and shove a teen girl's head up said turducken. You must then use scissors to cut her shirt up. Then, you take her pants off, remove her bra and panties, and ready a bottle of Diet Coke and Mentos to shove up her vagina and anus. When you pour Diet Coke and Mentos down her vagina and anus, you must suck her boobs slowly and softly while pissing in her vagina. You're then gonna need to grab a whip (if you haven't already) and command the girl to kneel and dig in while you ride on her back as if she were a horse. When she finishes, pour the leftovers in a blender, pour the mixture in the girl's mouth, and make out with her, in that order. Swallow afterwards.
Example:
Don't question the cum, shit, and vomit on the floor and dinner table. I just wished her "a happy Thanksgiving."


Thanksgiving
To commemorate a past event, you kill and eat an animal. It's a ritual sacrifice. With pie.
Example:
Thanksgiving isn't about blending of two cultures. It's about one culture wiping out another. And then they make animated specials about the part with the maize and the big belt buckles. They don't show you the next scene, where all the bison die and Squanto takes a musket ball in the stomach.


Thanksgiving
Example:
On Halloween:
Turkey 1: Say Joe have you heard the ghost story about "Thanksgiving"?
Turkey 2: No, what happens?
Turkey 1: Every year, on the same day, millions of Turkeys get their heads chopped off and then get eaten!
Turkey 2: Holy cow! Lucky it's just a ghost story.


Thanksgiving
In America, it is the only day of the year where it is guaranteed that almost every person within a 2,000-mile radius of you is eating the same exact meal at the exact same time.
Example:
Hey, Jim! What are you guys eating tonight?

Oh, you know, just having some Turkey.

No, way! That's what we're having tonight!

Oh, man that's sick! My neighbors down the block are having Turkey for dinner too!

Oh my God so are mine!!!

Let's be best friends!

Err... Happy Thanksgiving, Jim.


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