ass potatoes

inserting a potato in the rectum during intercourse



Ass Potatoes
Poop comprised of well-formed pieces, usually 1-3 in number, that are excreted quickly and with very little effort, and which generally require very little toilet paper usage afterwards. Ass Potatoes are similar in texture to Ass Nuggets, which are usually smaller and greater in number, and the antithesis of Ass Bread.
Example:
I just took a dump, and since I'm in a hurry, I was pleased when it turned out to be two quick ass potatoes instead of a bunch of ass bread.


Assed Potatoes
Mashed potatoes that are prepared inside the ass of a person, or any creature with a functional anus. The potatoes are typically mashed by a BBC, but any phallic and thrusting object will do the job.
Example:
Billy buttered up his butthole in anticipation of Tyrone coming over to make some assed potatoes.


Ass Potatoes
Small to large blisters, rectal warts, lesions or other growths occurring around the rectum. Their presence gives the affected area the appearance of a potato. The darkness of the rectum serving as the dark hide of the tuberous vegetable, and the warts, blisters & lesions serve as the "eyes" of the potato. If the inflicted individual has "bleached" their rectum they are then referred to as "Golden Ass Potatoes."
Example:
I was just about to perform anal sex on this hot cougar in the bed of her truck, but when she spread her cheeks I could see ass potatoes!


ass potato
Turd. The implication is that the turd is large and bulky, like a potato.

Can also be used as an insult, which connotes "lazy," as in "couch potato."
Example:
1.

Bob: "Hurry up in there."

Dave: "Dude, I'm right in the middle of an ass potato."

2.

Sheila: "Did we get those numbers from the main office yet?"

Juanita: "Nah, those ass potatoes are always late."


Ass Potato Pancake
When a woman with a flabby ass presses it into your face. This could be done to anally motorboat, perform analingus or cunnilingus. Can be used in both a positive and negative sense.
Example:
"How did things with that girl go last night?"
1) "They went well until she gave me the ass potato pancake"
or

2) "It was pretty dull until she gave me the ass potato pancake...then it was awesome!"


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