cigarettes

designed by insightful people, who realized that the last 7 yrs. of life are not worth living anyway. Those are the 7 yrs. you cant make coherent sentences, and you shit yourself constantly.



cigarettes
Cancer in a box sold to you by a smug corporation.
Example:
The office workers stood outside their building shivered in the rain as they smoked cigarettes and desperately tried to drain the life out of themselves.


cigarettes
cigarettes, cancer sticks, smokes, my life...

whichever way you put it, these things are wonderful and have kept me from beating up all the stupid bitches i would have normally beat up if i wasnt so calm.

and just to let you know, if you dont like them, then dont smoke them. and if you dont wanna be around them, then go away. but dont complain about it. believe me, nobody wants to hear that and its a waste of breath from your precious lungs. so just shut the fuck up cause we all know its bad for you. nobody cares.
Example:
two luckys: one for good luck, and one for good fuck.


cigarettes
something you can smoke every once in a while. You don't have to smoke them every day. I didn't.
Example:
1),Jeff: "What's that? It reminds me of when I was a teenager".
Angie: "Karen smokes".
Me (embarassed that she snitched after she promised me she wouldn't): "ANGIE!"
Angie: "Well, you're the one with the cigarettes in your hand!"
Jeff: "Smokey The Clove".

2) When I was a smoker I didn't smoke my cigarettes every day. How can you smokers manage to smoke a pack or two of cigarettes daily? I could never smoke that much. I only smoked six cigarettes maximum in a day, and that was fine for me.


cigarettes
the biggest waste of time youl ever have. They dont get you high, they just give you cancer. For every cigarette you had, if you substituted it with weed, you would feel so much better and live longer. Fuck the cigarettes, go by weed, feel good and live longer!
Example:
Throw away those shit cigarettes and try some of that real medicine, youl feel much better after smoking an ounce of this.


cigarettes
A highly controversial, highly profitable product on the market that is made to be smoked.

It is under fire because it destroys the human body in innumerable ways, is highly addictive, and has no medical benefit whatsoever. Generally, people who have been smoking for an extended period of times regret the experience and try to quit in vain (due to the fact that nicotine, a highly addictive substance, is contained in cigarettes). There are many strategies to quitting smoking such as a nicotine patch or chewing gum, designed to satiate the smoker's need for nicotine without killing the buyer.

Despite the fact that these products aimed at helping people quit smoking are making off very well, cigarettes are being banned in some other countries, and the discover that cigarettes contain types of poison and unsavory ingredients, this does not stop the average brain-dead teenager from picking up a pack and effectively inducing five different kinds of hell on their lungs.

Meanwhile, most other people regard them as complete idiots, and they will too, ten years down the line. Cigarettes are the things that some kids in every generation pick up and, being the stupid asshats that they are, think is actually helping them in some twisted way; when in fact, they will look back in twenty years when they are diagnosed with leukemia, mutter, "Wow, I was such a stupid asshat back then.". Then they will have stupid asshat kids, and those kids will, despite their parents' warnings, smoke cigarettes thinking that it's helping them in some twisted way.

Because as we all know, Stupidity is much stronger than logic, fact, and desire to keep one's lungs intact.
Example:
There are many corporations that profit off of human ignorance and people devoid of their own fucking brains, but none as much as the companies producing cigarettes.


cigarettes
coffin nails which kill people in the most horrific ways since the black death. cigarette compainies make billions on your backs. you mean nothing to them.

Pros. The sex appeal (cough)

Cons. It kills you
they have a horrific taste
they control you once addicted
more addictve than most drugs
destroy your lungs and your bronchioles
make your beauty decrease rapidly due to nicotine over-load
cost a lot to buy
Once addicted lose real pleasure
very anti-social
Example:
Youre paying someone to kill you slowly- why dont i just come round and drill holes into your skin every week?

Dont be a fool.


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