crochet Definition| Urban Word Dictionary

crochet

The art of making tablecloths, doilies, afghans, blankets out of yarn. Similar to knitting but with only 1 "needle" called a crochet hook.

crochet

by M. Stewart on Mar 25, 2003 10:15:03

something slut buckets do to pass their miserable, pointless hours. a time-consuming, life-wasting endeavor. often passed off as a "creative" activity. boring, stupid, kill yourself right now. (i'm kidding)

Example:
1. No, I'm sorry, I can't go to the Bob Dylan concert with you because I've gotta stay home and crochet. I'm way behind.

2. Dude, where's my crochet hook?

3. Get yo' bitch ass off da phone and back to crochetin'!

4. Oh my God, I didn't know Michael Stipe was gay. I'm gonna go home and crochet.

5. My grandmother sits outside the Cracker Barrel and crochets and yells at kids and she hates them because they're young and she remembers when she was young and how much more interesting her life was back then.

crochet

by sweetspanishflower on May 17, 2016 01:35:49

The process of tying knots to tie more knots to further tie knots, therefor making a scarf.

Example:
I wasted a lot of time making a scarf using crochet.

Crocheting

by OneWithTheTea on Aug 07, 2009 00:59:36

Really just another way of saying you are going to do absolutely nothing for the next three hours besides gossiping and eating some chocolate scones with some righteous chocolate macadamia nut tea.

Example:
In a year of going to the crochet group there were maybe three minutes of crocheting between talking about the sociopathic raging cuntrag/supermoms who claimed they were friends while scarfing scones, cookies, truffles and drinking an entire pot of chocolate macadamia nut tea.

Good times!

Person 1:"What did you work on at crocheting group???"
Person 2:"A desert plate!"

Crochet

by Mitch Hansen on Mar 03, 2006 10:03:01

1) Directionless meandering; to walk or otherwise transport about without destination.

Example:
Every day between 3 and 4 PM one can spot Mitch crocheting about campus.

crochet-ming

by itchymonkey on Dec 28, 2015 13:01:47

The act of someone with skills in the art of crochet applying a high level of scrutiny to the work of others, mainly knitters, but occasionally fellow crocheters, or the product produced by these people.

Example:
Wife: Look at her sorry excuse for a slouchy hat. The stitch is wrong, the pattern is bad, the wrong hook size was used and the yarn is acrylic.

Me: You're crochet-ming again.

gnat's crochet

by Wireman2018 on Jan 13, 2018 04:27:43

gnat's balls

Example:
the width of a gnat's crochet, Within a gnat's crotchet.
Well known saying on British radio Game Show, 'I'm Sorry I haven't a Clue'

crocheted bathtub

by Abby_c on Jul 07, 2017 04:49:31

Used as an analogy when describing something useless or not worth having.

Example:
"Latin was dead! It was about as useless to the common man, the majority of the populous, as the proverbial crocheted bathtub..."
“Looks like you win the crocheted bathtub.”

Spanish crocheting

by Yarnar300 on Dec 10, 2021 04:41:39

A often used euphemism for male masterbation making fun of the Spanish for thier flamboyancy and being feminine behavior.

Example:
Bro why are you Spanish crocheting in class?

Crotch crocheting

by Uncommon Merganser on Sep 13, 2019 06:19:50

A slang term for masturbation

Example:
When Tim was crotch crocheting Into Grandma’s wicker basket, he heard a door open.

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