programme

at last someone who knows how to spell



Programmer
A person who is paid to professionally scream at a computer.
Example:
Programmer: "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-oh, it works."


Programmer
pro·gram·mer (n) An organism capable of converting caffeine into code.
Example:
Programmer A "You started on that program yet? When's it due anyway?"

Programmer B "Nah, not yet, and its due tomorrow morning at eight!"

Programmer A "Damn, you gonna get it done in time?"

Programmer B "Yeah, I've got a bottle of Stacker II's and a pot of coffee, I should be fine."


Programmer
A programmer is a human, rock, or any other object capable of turning pizza and caffeine into code. Programmers minds are very complex - they like to explain things in ways that a normal human would not understand, and makes jokes that only programmers would laugh at.
Example:
Programmer 1: You create a gun module, a gun class, a foot module and a foot class. After realising you can't point the gun at the foot, you pass a reference to the gun to a foot object. After the foot is blown up, the gun object remains alive for eternity, ready to shoot all future feet that may happen to appear.

Programmer 2: BWAHAHAHAHAAHHA

Programmer 1: I even have one about Java!
You find that Microsoft and Sun have released imcompatible class libraries both implementing Gun objects. You then find that although there are plenty of feet objects implemented in the past in many other languages, you cannot get access to one. But seeing as Java is so cool, you dont care and go around shooting anything else you can find.


Programmer
A programmer is a person who passes as an exacting expert on the basis of being able to turn out, after innumerable punching, an infinite series of incomprehensive answers calculated with micrometric precisions from vague assumptions based on debatable figures taken from inconclusive documents and carried out on instruments of problematical accuracy by persons of dubious reliability and questionable mentality for the avowed purpose of annoying and confounding a hopelessly defenseless department that was unfortunate enough to ask for the information in the first place.
Example:
Finance Director: "Hey programmer guy. When is the stock predicted to change?"

Programmer: "01001001 00100000 01100100 01101111 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01101011 01101110 01101111 01110111"


Latest Searches

aww man, buet, Ivrit, luddicious, midget, bake a cake, Schulz, mona, battle, Quick wit, faliure, realized, art style, snorts, Took my breath away, these guys, pi, you sleep, a fish, my math teacher, tassel, not to be, boing boing, vend, exampler, we can, Yoo, Easy to, looking fly, a perfect person, applying pressure, magical dragon, stroked, Over Thinking, pretty much, boo bear, 1,000,000, RONS, your head, ayna, sexual orientation, betta splendens, rice krispies, tight jeans, sexualize, Shroomer, jelly bean, Suh, wig pushed back, whay, Alex do, Eylon, lay back, golden, Marija, in the hood, Ritualizing, analysis, Big Luke, HEARD IT, rodeo, Revue, mutate, organic, the NIGHT, ohhh, Parmi, mayte, smash that, uncoordinated, banksy, donny boy, Shit dogg, post-punk, have a good day, big fat, Yo That, Old Lady, cartoon porn, dno, my soul, plead the 21st, in the groove, utterly, gay cunt, ipod, Marinara sauce, the Fiend Club, ALL TIME, Elitist, wakes, Tigry, vlookup, mald, Executive Branch, rim, antidote, third eye, Rhode Island, so far gone, Do me, taperd, most good, Preteens, sign language, Gender neutral, ILLITERATE FUCK, hashtags, hand up, Pelvic, Endgame, ex husband, aloe vera, fawning, gift for gift, decision lane, To mind, grapey, tenerife, Pity, Threads, a cable, S-I-M-P, we will see, the Harry Potter, social casualty, you beat, Marx Brothers, phat, tribunal, cranked, Saint Denis, airsoft gun, aide, fucktard, According to google, Tyrone Mclaughlin, Zurich, paragon, ref, alliteration, broken bottle, jams, juniors, heat, ginger sex, Dreaming, Nothing Doing, seismograph, WHO LEFT, Hey bro, Flairing, Bills, Coloradans, Ketamine, Breaking Bad, Tyler, ejaculate, payback, cunter, couponing, the womb, the court, COLD, Bees, hate crime, me asf, deathball 5000, dead, Lovis, there is nothing, a makayla, booking, My life, all but, got Dead, the control, necro, mediocre, nuthin, basketeering, Heart and soul, Love Interest, the cutest, monkey bar, tea, long stroke, onto, getaway, Shamrock, banged out, What if, views, gentleman, Skunkworks, salahi, take off every zig, go to great lengths, sweeten, zit, programme, aww man, buet, Ivrit, luddicious, midget, bake a cake, Schulz, mona, battle, Quick wit, faliure, realized, art style, snorts, Took my breath away, these guys, pi, you sleep, a fish, my math teacher, tassel, not to be, boing boing, vend, exampler, we can, Yoo, Easy to, looking fly, a perfect person, applying pressure, magical dragon, stroked, Over Thinking, pretty much, boo bear, 1,000,000, RONS, your head, ayna, sexual orientation, betta splendens, rice krispies, tight jeans, sexualize, Shroomer, jelly bean, Suh, wig pushed back, whay, Alex do, Eylon, lay back, golden, Marija, in the hood, Ritualizing, analysis, Big Luke, HEARD IT, rodeo, Revue, mutate, organic, the NIGHT, ohhh, Parmi, mayte, smash that, uncoordinated, banksy, donny boy, Shit dogg, post-punk, have a good day, big fat, Yo That, Old Lady, cartoon porn, dno, my soul, plead the 21st, in the groove, utterly, gay cunt, ipod, Marinara sauce, the Fiend Club, ALL TIME, Elitist, wakes, Tigry, vlookup, mald, Executive Branch, rim, antidote, third eye, Rhode Island, so far gone, Do me, taperd, most good, Preteens, sign language, Gender neutral, ILLITERATE FUCK, hashtags, hand up, Pelvic, Endgame, ex husband, aloe vera, fawning, gift for gift, decision lane, To mind, grapey, tenerife, Pity, Threads, a cable, S-I-M-P, we will see, the Harry Potter, social casualty, you beat, Marx Brothers, phat, tribunal, cranked, Saint Denis, airsoft gun, aide, fucktard, According to google, Tyrone Mclaughlin, Zurich, paragon, ref, alliteration, broken bottle, jams, juniors, heat, ginger sex, Dreaming, Nothing Doing, seismograph, WHO LEFT, Hey bro, Flairing, Bills, Coloradans, Ketamine, Breaking Bad, Tyler, ejaculate, payback, cunter, couponing, the womb, the court, COLD, Bees, hate crime, me asf, deathball 5000, dead, Lovis, there is nothing, a makayla, booking, My life, all but, got Dead, the control, necro, mediocre, nuthin, basketeering, Heart and soul, Love Interest, the cutest, monkey bar, tea, long stroke, onto, getaway, Shamrock, banged out, What if, views, gentleman, Skunkworks, salahi, take off every zig, go to great lengths, sweeten,
×

Our website is made possible by displaying online advertisements to our visitors.
Please consider supporting us by disabling your ad blocker.


I have disabled the ad blocker! Show me how!