safety net

a back up person boy or girl that way if it don't work out with your first choice or girl/boyfriend you have someone to fall back on that way there's no waiting around for someone new.



safety net
A term used in the game show Deal or No Deal when the majority of low amounts are still in play, but there are two high amounts to justify continuing the game.
Example:
Howie Mandel: Now the question is: deal or no deal.
Contestant: $275,000 is life-changing, but the $300,000 and $400,000 boxes are still in play! So I still have my 'safety net'. No deal!!!


safety net
To line the bowl of the toilet with loo roll so the poo wont land in the water that you will have just pissed in and splash piss all over your bare ass. Also useful if you have an interest in what size, colour etc of your poo as it will land on the tissue for examination
Example:
Oh I forgot to put a safety net down, my ass is covered in piss and my poo has sunk


safety net
an extension of the slang 'safe' where a situation is extremely favourable, an ultimate plus.
Example:
Me: yo how much wud u rate this girl from 1-10
friend:damn shes a fine 10, u know her?
Me: yea im gonna see her in a couple of weeks and shes up for it
friend: Safety net!


Train Spotting Safety Net
(n) Stag term for the drug Naloxone ( aka NARCAN). Term is based on the drug addiction movie Train Spotting and the drugs use in countering opioid overdose.
Example:
Don't worry. We can shoot up. I've got plenty of Train Spotting Safety Net in case we OD.

Train Spotting Safety Net is great but who's going to administer it if we OD?


Safety-net sub
After studying the vertigo-inducing range of lunchbreak subs (e.g. Taleggio, pine nut, grapefruit and rocket) - the overworked mind generally opts for less hostile territory. Picking an uncool, but boot-filling standby - (e.g. cheese).
Example:
Jim: Hey Bob, you gotta try this sun-dried octopus on flax-seed crostini. And it's only eight bucks fifty!
Bob: Nah man, I'm set with my safety-net sub.
Jim: (*shrugs*)
Bob: Ham.


Safety-net sub
After scanning the vertigo-inducing range of lunchbreak subs (e.g. Taleggio, pine nut, grapefruit and rocket) - the confused mind generally opts for friendlier territory. Picking an uncool, but boot-filling standby - (e.g. cheese).

Example:
Jim: Hey Bob, you gotta try this sun-dried octopus on flax-seed crostini. And it's only eight bucks fifty!
Bob: Nah man, I'm set with my Safety-net sub .
Jim: (*shrugs*)
Bob: Ham.



a**h**e safety-net
A.k.a. "a**h**e insurance". Refers to where you habitually bring a really intolerably-obnoxious human along with you on potentially-dangerous excursions, such as on an airline-trip, into battle or a "bad" part of town, on a road-trip through natural-disaster areas like flooding or rock-slides, into a hazardous-materials area, etc., to better your own chances of survival. The theory behind this practice, of course, is that whenever there is a widespread catastrophe or other mass-annihilation incident, statistically the "nice" folks are usually the ones who get killed, while the super-nasty inhabitants in the disaster-area invariably seem to escape with little or no injury. So the obvious conclusion would be that if you "keep your friends close and your enemies even closer" (i.e., always stay right next to the acridly-antisocial hombre who's accompanying you), the Fate gods --- who apparently like and favor the mean folks, since they always seem to spare them --- will be hesitant to allow anything harmful to occur in your vicinity, since they would not want to risk harming or killing one of their precious meanie-jerks, as well. Simple, but effective, and a lot cheaper and more reliable than buying death/accident-insurance.
Example:
The concept of the "a**h**e safety-net" is nothing new --- it's actually just kinda the reverse of taking hostages: while the latter involves keeping desirable people close to you so that their fellow humans will not send bullets or bombs your way for fear of hurting their abducted loved ones, the former strategy also utilizes the "human shield" concept, but in the exact opposite way... no respectable human being would give a rat's a** if your cranky-natured companion were eliminated ("Good riddance!"), but the Gods of Fate would indeed wish to maintain the well-being of such miscreant, and so they will feel forced to let you live on, as well.


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