sumerian

When a man has explosive diarrhea into a turkey vultures beak/mouth. The turkey vulture is then electrocuted and skull-fucked by a wooly mammoth. afterwards, the wooly mammoth is usually enraged to a point of impossible rage and proceeds to stampede the man and bust a galloon of sperm in his face. This is know as the Sumerian Piledriver



Sumerian Footjob
Imagine the grimiest, dirtiest, sloppiest footjob of all time. This usually includes the added pleasure of several calluses and the cuts from overgrown toenails.
Example:
Mark: Yo Staysie, my girl gave me a Sumerian Footjob last night.

Staysie: How'd it go?

Mark: Yeah, but I'm pretty sure I have yellow fever now.


Sumerian Tavern Joke
The earliest example of a bar joke is Sumerian, on a tablet dating from the early Old Babylonian Empire (c. 1894-1800 BC), and it features a dog: "A dog, having walked into an inn, did not see anything, (and so he said): 'Shall I open this (door)?'." The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life and has been lost, but the words remain.
Example:
i cry myself to sleep every night thinking about the Sumerian tavern joke and the Sumer way of life. Oh to be a dog born in Mesopotamia between 3500 and 3000 B.C.E


Sumerian Ball Fucker
When you're older and your balls sag far enough, you can shove them in your own arse and Ball Fuck yourself.
Example:
Strange episode of Ancient Aliens last night explained how widowed, Sumerian men (Sumerian Ball Fuckers) would shove their sagging balls up their own ass to achieve a release.


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