temporal

relating to the everyday world as opposed to that which is spiritual or eternal.



temporal disorientation
A state in which an individual has no bearing of time whatsoever. Can be caused by long periods of drinking, heavy drinking, concussions, coma, deep sleeps, or just general obliviousness.
Example:
After that 12th tequila shot I came to at my buddy's house in a state of complete temporal disorientation.

I jacked Mike in the head so hard he didn't know what day it was (temporal disorientation).


temporal mechanics
Theory that relates to the study of time travel. Often seen causing major paradoxes, such as the Dali Paradox, Grandfather Paradox, Pogo Paradox and the Predestination Paradox.
Example:
The Dali Paradox is when a temporal fissure slows time to a gradual halt. Also called the "melting clock" effect

The Grandfather Paradox is when a person travels to a point in the past before they were born and kills one of their own ancestors, taking themselves out of the picture before they were able to travel back in time.

The Pogo Paradox is where interference designed to prevent an event actually triggers the same event.

The Predestination Paradox is like as follows: Say a man goes back in time and impregnates his great-great grandmother. The grandmother would thus give birth to one of the man's great grandparents, who would then give birth to one of his grandparents, who would then be able to give birth to one of his parents, and finally to the man himself. As a result, the man's very existence would be pre-determined by his traveling to the past, and therein lies the paradox.


temporally disoriented
At a loss of time. Usually happens when either dumb, drunk, high, well-sexed, post-comatose, or cerebrally traumatized. Usually leads to negative consequences...
Example:
I was boffing my secretary so hard that I became temporally disoriented and missed my 3 o'clock.

Me and Rob got spliffed and, in a classic example of temporal disorientation, forgot to meet up w/ my hook up for another bag.


Temporal Fist
noun-The psychokinetic ability to do a mind-blowing punch while time is frozen
verb-To do a dynamic mind-blowing punch while time is stopped
Example:
noun-Master Furon taught the Temporal Fist to Crypto in Destroy All Humans 3: Path of the Furon
noun-Master Furon's Temporal Fist and Captain Falcon's Falcon Pawnch collided and the Temporal Fist won.( for Captain Falcon lovers He's cool but I just wanted to get on my friends nerves with this example)
verb-Master Furon Temporal Fisted Crypto into a wall.


Temporal Paradox
You fucking up history.

It'd be like going back in time and shooting yourself in the head, you'd die, but you wouldn't appear back in time to kill yourself, so you'd have to wait until after you said you'd do it to successfully kill yourself, right? Wrong, you still wouldn't have done it, so history resets, and if you are one retarded motherfucker, you will try it again until you stop buttfucking your grandmother in her prime back in the 1940's
Example:
Adrian Shephard in Gearbox's 'Opposing Force', If you jumped into the Portal after Gordon, it would say subject terminated stating that the reason being was that you attempted to create a temporal paradox


Temporal Pedabation
The act of travelling back in time to molest oneself as a child. This activity raises several questions, is it masturbation since it is you? Is it pedophilia since it is a kid? And what's more pschologically damaging, being molested or growing up to realize it was you?
Example:
Marty got so wound up the other night talking about temporal pedabation,he got in the delorean and fucked himself in the ass after his 7th birthday.


Temporal Paradox
1: When the very flow of time colapses upon in itself due to a temporal incursion or "Time Travel" Noteworthy people who have gone backward in time would be...Well, that guy in Timecop....Shut up.
Anyhoo, don't go back in time, because you'll only crush a mosquito and destroy Berlin.

For more information on time paradoxes, Play TimeSplitters: Future Perfect. or watch a ST: Voyager episodes when it goes back in time...They have it down.

2. Whatever went on with Red Foreman and that big ship in Star Trek: Voyager. Like, seriously, WTF? Temporal Shielding? And why could they live forever if they're protected from time. They'd age normally! Sorry, it's just the fact you could erase places from time looks cool, but is just not feasible.
Example:
"What the hell, you're me!"
"Yeah, I knew you'd say that. Take this key, it's for that door. You won't make it through without it."
"If you couldn't make it through, who gave it to you?"
"I did"
"What?!"
"Just shut up, I gotta go and save us from a big snake"
"If you're me, then-"
"1978"
"But when"
"Yesterday"
"How-"
"I'm you right?"
"Oh yeah....How many fingers am I holding up?"
"I'm you, I'm not psychic....4"
"F%$#!"
"Really, now go on ahead through that door, and watch out for...Never mind"
"Huh?"


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