Prosecco

The drink of choice for every young to middle aged basic white girl



Prosecco Mum
Usually found in groups, often from council estates, often wearing garments featuring fake Swarovski’s, Ugg boots, long straight hair extensions with a bad ombré job. Walls at home emblazoned with vinyl decals with ‘Love Laugh Live’ or similar. Describe themselves as ‘full time mummy’ on Facebook. They get pissed on prosecco before going out leaving the kids to make their own spaghetti hoops for tea. Then writing statuses like ‘my kids are my world’ while snorting coke in the toilets at Revolution. They have ‘the girls’ round for a few quiet drinks on a Tuesday night, and the police get called by neighbours at around 3am. They will need handbag sized bottles of Prosecco the next day to do the school run. Some role models of the Prosecco Mum include: Katie Price, Kim Kardashian and anyone from TOWIE. A group of Prosecco Mums is known as a ‘Murder’ of Prosecco Mums. If no Prosecco is obtainable a ‘PM’ may resort to putting petrol in the Soda Stream. Favourite phrases include: U ok Hun? and I’m fumming babes. The Prosecco Mum often is to be found with a Stella Dad. A popular career for a PM would be a Juice Plus Rep, this gives them time for childcare. Childcare in this case is allowing their offspring to run riot in public places while they take dog ear selfies on their phones.
Example:
“Did you see that girl on Jeremy Kyle? She was a proper Prosecco Mum”


Prosecco Princess
A girl who wants a champagne lifestyle on a shoe string budget, with an air of entitlement.

Probably has life love laugh quotes everywhere and makes out their really glam.

Someone who has grown up with rich parents and they continue to leech off this and others into adulthood.
Example:
Friend 1: My girlfriend wants me to take on holiday to the Caribbean now. It's the third time we have been away this year. Of course she isnt paying for any of it.

Friend 2: yeah, she is abit of Prosecco princess

Friend 1: Yeah she got proper pissed at her mums party the other night and I had to go and pick her up.


prosecco ghetto
Any area of any large town or city where it is predominantly middle class. The tell tale signs are a Londis or Bargain Booze that is selling upmarket items like organic Cous Cous and Prosecco.
Example:
I have just bought a flat in the middle of Prosecco Ghetto its very nice and near to Waitrose.


prosecco tit
An individual under the influence of alcohol of the prosecco variety. This individual may act in a way considered as a total tit. All actions are exempt due to prosecco influence.
Example:
Hey mate isn't Vanessa acting weird?
Don't worry mate she's just being a prosecco tit.


prosecco walk
A walk outside, e.g. around the block, with a glass of prosecco as a brief escape from the endless whirl of news about catastrophic events (e.g. a brutal military invasion of a sovereign, democratic nation).
Example:
Ugh, I've been staring at news from Ukraine all day, it's so sad and infuriating. Let's get some fresh air and go on a prosecco walk.

We've been staring at our phones for 4 hours now. Instead of increasing our anxiety levels even more, let's discuss how we can call on our government to actually help with the situation on a prosecco walk.


Prosecco Reese's Rocket
After shaking a Prosecco bottle sprayed all over a woman clothed only in two Reese's cups.
Example:
Last night that Prosecco Reese's Rocket cost me $37; it was so worth.


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