pulchritude
perhaps the most ironic word in the English language. Few would guess that this awkward jumbling together of hard consonants means "physically attractive." Anyone, whether or not they know its meaning, ought to feel offended, and possibly violated, when likened to this unequivocally ugly word or any of its variants. An exception would be sepulchritude, which refers to a supremely destructive display of physical comeliness. Pulling off an act of sepulchritude is really awesome.
Example:
James, if you make reference to my so-called 'pulchritude' again, however flattering your intentions, I will be forced to castrate you with this spork.
James, if you make reference to my so-called 'pulchritude' again, however flattering your intentions, I will be forced to castrate you with this spork.