Schrodinger's

An Austrian scientist who proposed the modern equations for QED (which would evolve from them QCD) creating more or less the modern atomic model.



schrodinger
DUMB VERSION:
someone who fucking put a cat in a box with something dangerous that would have a 50% chance to kill the cat so that he could explain "paralell universes" better
GOOD VERSION:
schrodinger (1887-1961) was a man who wanted to describe that...feeling...when...a path forks, and...how to emphasize on that. so, he made "schrodinger's cat", a tale as old as time, where he stuffed a cat in a box, and put something dangerous in it (we actually don't know what it was) that had a 50% chance of killing the cat. now, this setup resulted is something interesting: WE DO NOT KNOW IF THE CAT IS DEAD OR ALIVE, UNTIL WE LIFT THE LID ON THE BOX. this shattered the universe and duplicated it, where there were now TWO of the exact same universe that of which only difference was a cat that was dead and one that was alive. he had single handedly described the fork in the road...PARALELL UNIVERSES.
Example:
schrodinger


Schrodinger's Idiot
Someone who says really stupid things, then decides whether or not he was joking based upon the reaction of people around him.
Example:
Guy 1: I'd love to visit Africa

Guy 2: what country?

Guy 1: I just said, Africa

Guy 2: that's a continent idiot

Guy 1: I... I know that, I was only joking.

Guy 2: you're a real schrodinger's idiot


schrodinger’s douchebag
One who makes douchebag statements, particularly sexist, racist or otherwise bigoted ones, then decides whether they were “just joking” or dead serious based on whether other people in the group approve or not.
Example:
"Oh man women should just stay in the kitchen, it's the only place they're useful"
*with one group* "Haha just kidding, that's sexist"
*with anther* "lol amirite"
"You're a total schrodinger’s douchebag you know that right?"


Schrodinger's Blowjob
Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmosome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?
Example:
Dude, would you risk taking off the blindfold in the Schrodinger's Blowjob?


Schrodinger's douchebag
Someone who is a jerk and decides whether they were joking or not based on how people reacted.
Example:
He is such a Schrodinger's douchebag


Schrodinger's compliment
When a girl compliments a guy and he has to figure out if she is flirting or just being nice, leaving the compliment in duel state of both an act of friendship and of flirting until the guy asks.
Example:
What's wrong with him?
My boy got hit with Schrodinger's compliment and now he's having a crisis.


Schrodinger's Biden
The version of Joe Biden that exists in the minds of conservatives where he is simultaneously clueless and ineffective, evil and manipulative.
Example:
Schrodinger's Biden hasn't accomplished a thing in 50 years in government but can also manipulate gas prices to swing an election his way.


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