information systems

basically the same as computer. only difference is that they have a life. computer scinece people tend to be tooo nerdy and psychotic.



Information Systems
The great link between Business (or end process) and Computer Science
Involving the way information is gathered, processed, and used in a meaningful way.
Computer Science Majors – boast about how many lines of code they can write
Information Systems Majors – boast about how much money they have saved and created for overall business.
Business Majors – boast about their new sports car after high earnings and cut cost - dependent on the performance on their Information Systems which is dependent on Computer Science.
Information Systems creates logical use out of organizing and processing data through information technology.
IS makes CS useful
IS makes Business actually work (and increasingly so in the new Information Era)
Top IS programs: MIT and Carnegie Mellon
IS has yet to find a permanent home in the School of Computer Science, Business, Humanities
Professionals in IS who are really good at what they do are an asset to any company and are normally paid accordingly. Or can leave and find their place somewhere else (sometime creating their own business – usually successful)
IS professionals also have bigger hard drives than CS and Business professionals as well as cocks.
Example:
Hey man, did jimmy order those parts before he got fired?
No dude, our Information Systems does that automatically now.

CFO: "we need to be able to process 9 million transactions integrated with EDI and have our production line update automatically while being able to offer real time analysis and GPS tracking as well as electronic invoicing. Oh, and if one thing does not work correctly (even if the correct way contradicts our business logic) YOU ARE FIRED"

CIO: "Okay"


Information Systems
The major for people that aren't smart enough to handle computer science.

Typically involving idiots that want to work for a large company, sit in a cubicle, and work for people that don't typically understand a thing about computers (other than the fact that they can look at pr0n with them).

This is usually ok as a typical IS major is only a notch or two above their computer illiterate coworkers.

Typical IS tasks: Helping their boss figure out how to change the font on their word document, creating a 'database' using an Excel spreadsheet, helping their boss erase the lemonparty.com history item off their workstation.

While not all IS majors are bad or stupid people, the sad truth is that the bad and stupid ones often end up in charge of actual computer scientists because they 'know tech'
Example:
I wanted to work in computers but all that math, science, and actually understanding shit was too hard, so I went into Information Systems.


Higher Information Systems
Commonly believed amongst computer nerds to be an ACTUAL subject ...

Boy .. they were wrong.

So what is an information system?

It is a fancy name for a database, most commonly found in the Yellow Pages.

Fortunetly for the natives of Scotland, their examination authority offer qualifications in the subject on a normal and higher level.

One more step towards an education system made up of simple, skivvy subjects.
Example:
Most people believe that ghosts are examples of Higher Information Systems, thus non existant.

Like MI6 and Jesus.


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