jared

a great guy with a gigantic dick



jared

by willow1098 on Oct 15, 2018 23:04:32

hes 19 and never learned how to fucking read
Example:
Teacher: Jared could you read this

Jared:i cant Hi my name is Jared and i never fucking learned how to read


jared

by wewuzanonymous on Oct 05, 2018 04:59:21

A male of the mentally challenged variety who enjoys showing up thirty minutes late to everything, crying while masturbating, killing homeless people because he is protected under the Second Class Citizen Law, and trying to bone highschool girls.
Example:
Jordan: Hey, i thought your friend was going to be here by now.
Jay: Yeah, it’s Jared so he’ll be 30 minutes late as usual.


jared

by jeny on Mar 02, 2008 06:32:45

a person whos name is jared duh. hes weird and random at times and he also sings annoying songs that get stuck in my head. blahzerz!
Example:
jeny: jared your soo weird

jared: no u!

jeny: jk your cool

jared: no u!

jeny: aww thanks teehee!!

jared: no u!

jeny: k.. getting annoying now.

jared: lalalala

jeny: ah my ears!


jared

by Von Cockenberg on Jan 03, 2011 14:37:48

(v.) the act of sodomizing an unsuspecting homosexual negroid; often results in the contraction of AIDS. When jareding, the perpetrator lures in a pack of niggers with a bucket of fresh KFC. As the apes feast on the chicken, he thoroughly inspects them, searching for the one with the largest, most African elephant dick.

Although penises with piercings and other tribal deformities are preferred, the largest cock will suffice for jareding. Once a suitable porch monkey is selected, he will coerce the creature with pictures of female apes. As the negroid achieves a massive erection, the jareder will sneak up and position his well greased anus above the shaft.

In one swift motion, the perpetrator impales his ass on the cock and rides it like a cowboy from Brokeback Mountain, eventually causing the negroid to ejaculate. In the final step of jareding, the sick fuck will proceed to collect the semen and pour it over fresh chalupas, as he is usually 13 year old faggot Taco Bell fanboy. As he eats the chalupas, the jareder smiles with joy stroking his tiny 2.3" dick to a picture of Jack Bauer, contemplating his next victim.
Example:
Blake: My asshole is feeling really tight, you wanna go jared tonight?

Jared: Sure Mr. Locati! I'd love to go, although I call dibs on your freshly made semen-covered tacos, I'm too much of a curly headed fucking jew to pay for Taco Bell! Did I mention I'm gay?


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