David Ortiz

an overated overweight piece of flaming shit everyone thiks he's god cuz he can hit home runs, but he cannot get to first without getting ass cramps and can't field for a dead moose's last shit



David Ortiz
A Designated Hitter for the Boston Redsox, widely believed to be a big proponent and user of Human Growth Hormones and Steroids.
Example:
Now Batting, David Ortiz. Woah, look at that back acne!


David Ortiz
A player for the boston red sox baseball team considered by many to be one of the best hitters to ever grace the sport of baseball...With amazing ability to hit homeruns he got his team out of a few jams in the 2004 playoffs
Example:
boston loves their DH David Ortiz


David Ortiz
The Designated Hitter for Boston Red Sox. Nicknamed Big Papi.

He is one of the most bad ass mother fuckers to grace the game of baseball.

Believed to be the second coming of Jesus in the Dominican Republic.
Example:
Dude, did you see that Dominican praying to a golden statue of David Ortiz aka Big Papi? I don't blame him.


David Ortiz
A big hitting DH for the Boston Red Sox, who hits homers with a ration of about 1:6!!!!!!!!!!
Example:
The DH for the Red Sx, wearing #34 and often doing goofy hadshakes!You may also know David Ortiz as........ Big Papi!


david ortiz
Probably the biggest steroid user Red Sox history.

His body is so fucked up from 'roids to the point that he can't even play first base.
Example:
David Ortiz didn't do shit for years in Minnesota. Then he goes to Boston and starts belting HRs left and right. Can you say steroids?


david ortiz salas
confuses himself for a woman named Jessica. Likes Rakish and jumping the border (ole). enjoys meme's but who doesn't? HATES weeaboos's, loves bronies, and cant stand isabella.
Example:
David Ortiz Salas: I HATE weeaboos's!!!
Weeaboo: *cries*
David Ortiz Salas: let's go jump the border!
Rakish: hell no, you're a bronie!
David Ortiz Salas: NO! IM JESSICA!


David Ortiz theory
The explanation as to why Ortiz has no home runs yet. There are two theories.
A)He was a juicer, stopped, and now sucks.
B)He is just too old and fat to hit one.
Example:
Guy 1: Why hasn't Ortiz gone deep yet?
Guy 2: He is horrible now that he stopped juicing.
Guy 3: No, he's just too old to hit one.
Guy 1: Ah, the David Ortiz theory in action.


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