Fat Kidded

When one is socially shunned by various groups of peers. This parallels the "fat kid" that no one ever wanted on their kick ball team in elementary school.



Fat Kid
Any person who, regardless of age, sex or stature, adores food with every fiber of their being. Note that being a fat kid does not imply anything about a person's weight; it is purely a state of mind.

Certain moments and activities can be categorized as Fat Kid Moments and/or Activities. Examples: going to the grocery store at 2am because all you want in life are brownies; eating an entire pint of Ben&Jerrys when you really only meant to have a bite; pity eating the last bite/portion of food on a plate/bowl/cake pan; assuming other people's food left in the fridge more than three days is automatically up for grabs; patronizing buffet restaurants more than is strictly necessary/healthy/sane; putting whipped cream on..well..everything; interjecting thoughts about food into conversations that had nothing to do with food until that point; etc.
Example:
"So...you going back for thirds, too?"
"Um, obviously. Haha omg we're such fat kids."

"Dude I'm such the fat kid...Everyone at the party had these dainty portions on their plates, and I was wolfing down crackers and goat cheese like it was my job."

"Hey, did you read that article on Mexican sociocultural shifts and the escalating tension between adolescent social groups?"
"Mmm...Mexican food."


Fat Kid
Fat Kids are (as the name suggests) fat. They play Fortnite and eat chips in their rooms all day, and have no friends.

They are extremely lazy, and most of the time don’t realize how fat they are. Fat kids like to avoid sports. One example of a fat kid is me. I have no life, and spend my time writing fucking retarded posts on Urban Dictionary.

Why I say this is if you were to look at me, you’d think “Holy shit he’s so fat”. And I don’t blame you for it. In fact, I implore you to think stuff like that. You see, when you’re the fat kid, you take pride in your gigantic thighs and your large shins that jiggle as you walk. You take pride in your double chins that become even more noticable when you make literally any facial impression at all. You take pride in your man boobs and your belly that gets the shirt stuck onto it, and all your fat rolls and waves that form in your belly whenever you move show perfectly. You take pride in your huge ass that flops from side to side as you run.

Because you see, I’m a fat kid. And I’m proud to be a fucking lazy ass bitch who’s fat ass just keeps growing and growing and his massive wavelike belly just keeps growing and growing and his entire fucking awesome body just keeps getting bigger and bigger until you get all the attraction you so desire in school, in public, and even other amazing fat kids that you can befriend.

Be proud of who you are, because everyone’s fucking amazing. 😎
Example:
Dude 1: Hey, look at fat ass over there.

Dude 2: What about him?

Dude 1: Watch this...

*Dude 1 walks over to me*

Dude 1: Yooo! Nice shirt.

Me: Thanks.

Dude 1: How much did it cost?

Me: Well, it costed a lot because my huge fat belly is just too huge and awesome to try to cover up.

Dude 1: ...

*I slap my belly and it jiggles a lot*

*Dude 1 walks away*

Dude 1: He’s such an awesome fat kid..

Dude 2: Yep.

(TRUE STORY XD)


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