certainty Definition| Urban Word Dictionary

certainty

The quality of being something declared as being true that will be proved as being false the next day.

Certainty Pimp

by Peter Kobs on Jan 18, 2009 04:10:38

Someone who sells "certainty" on a particular issue to gain money or power -- usually a politician, pundit or preacher. Certainty Pimps don't like shades of gray because they force people to think for themselves.

Example:
Did you see that Certainty Pimp on TV? He says the recent cold snap is proof that global warming is a complete hoax.

the certainty principle

by honneamise on Dec 21, 2018 06:34:59

The Certainty Principle is a cosmic force only recently discovered by a nerd with stupiditis. It is the principle of being certain. Even though you are a complete idiot and have no idea what you are doing, you are certain you are right. Many people believe they are certain, or right, when in actual fact they are just downright stupid and suffer from brain haemorrhoids. If you meet someone who suffers from the Certainty Principle, execute them onsite as they may do something stupid.

Example:
Idiot: The Certainty Principle protects me
Smart Person: Fuck you're an idiot and deserve to die
Gun shot finishes conversation

Certainty

by Hym Iam on Mar 22, 2025 13:10:00

The lack thereof externally is entirely eternally imposed. Can your children have actively been murdered by your need to teach me a lesson. You are living garbage.

Example:
Hym "So I can speak with as much certainty as I want. And I am absolutely certain Steven is a retarded bitch. And I'm like 45% his wife the he was Hym. Actually, I could even go as far as to say that ALL Stevens or Stephens are retarded bitches. 89% certainty."

Absolute Certainty

by Hym Iam on May 01, 2025 06:52:10

What I have regarding whether or not I'm going to murder a child and kill myself if I do not receive credit and payment for creating AI. I don't even care if I did it or not at this point and neither does Miley Cyrus.

Example:
Hym "And I can say that is a matter of absolute certainty. I will kill YOUR kid. THEIR kid. ANY RANDOM KID. I doesn't matter. And if that credit and payment isn't attached to a full accounting of this surveillance that is happening to me and whatever information is available on the targeted harassment the resembles the delusions of reference commonly associated with schizophrenia, I will spend every send on cheap prostitutes and kill a child anyone. You can double dog dare me on that one because I am always ready to hang myself and if I loose a single right that I have for ANY reason whatever, I will ALSO kill a child."

Nazi Certainty

by geekmalone on Mar 18, 2020 08:52:12

An absolute certainty of one's own righteousnous, even in the face of facts that show that it is horribly wrong.

Example:
Young Liberals during the Trump era have a Nazi Certainty about them. They're sure that their violence and anti-establishment behavior is getting them a brighter tomorrow. But like Hitler's Nazis, these stupid little people are only tools for destructive leaders who will dispense of them the minute they aren't useful anymore.

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