plural of ese. purnounced:; essays

Y the fuk do we get essays!!????? There crap n' borin n' long.......
n' sumtimes even afta spendin AGES on the damn thingz u say dey aint even gud enough!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

useless work used to torture billions of kids in this world

what you are probably avoiding doing by being on this website in the first place

A ploy conceived by English teachers to show their jaded outlook towards students who are either too stupid to do it anyway, or are smart, but prefer pin-point to the point answering rather than spending five paragraphs trying to convince "X" to do "Y". They usually give people a week or so to do the essay, but it is known fact that nobody does the stupid things until the night before it's due.

Something that my english teacher didn't teach me.

assigned by teachers as a form of torture viewed as acceptable by society. Complaining to the teacher about the work it entails it wrong, but said teacher is allowed to bitch and moan about grading it as long as he/she pleases.

In the educational system, an essay is a long informational paper that is supposed to be 3 or more pages long with an introduction, at least 3 "detailed" body paragraphs with "source citations" up the wazoo, a conclusion, AND a bibliography with at least (insert large number here) "reliable" sources (NOT Wikipedia). Oh, and did I mention that some of these sources need to be from books & magazines that we always need to run to the library for, too? The topics for these wretched pieces of work are almost always going to be out of your control, so prepare to write about absolute bull. Research for these papers require hours of web surfing and/or book searching, since you need both a "reliable" source and a source in which you can extract a considerable amount of info from. So don't be surprised if you find yourself venturing beyond page 2 of the Google results. In addition to the pain you must endure from just finding useful info in a sea of crap, you must also cite almost EVERYTHING using MLA Format, putting the icing on the cake of frustration. If you don't, your whole essay will be a complete waste (see plagiarism).If you are in high school or college, you also have to write a lengthy evaluation of the sources themselves in your bibliography (a.k.a. "Annotated Bibliography"), which means even MORE running around. Once that cluster of bull is dealt with, the average academic essay is done, and the hell-bent burden of essay writing is lifted. . . for now.

Work that teachers do to torture their students. No one likes them and teachers except for the teachers who love watching their students suffer.