machete Definition| Urban Word Dictionary

machete

spanish word for fucking big ass knife

machete

by Gumba Gumba on Apr 12, 2004 19:12:48

A knife with a handle longer than most blades, and a thin, long, staight-edged blade. Used for hacking away at foliage in front of the weilder.

Example:
Hello, my name is Jason Vorhees, I wear a hockey mask, and I am a machete-killer addict

machete

by P. Kaltenbach on Jan 12, 2008 06:01:22

Something you pull on 10 guys wanting to jump you in the parking lot of a BP. Usually with an 18 inch blade and a thick hard plastic handle.

Example:
*Van pulls up and a gaggle of people jump out*
Jesse: Are you the fuckers I am supposed to whip the shit out of?
Me: HEY! Fuck you guys you are bringing 10 guys?!!? Well, this makes it even Jesse, Me, and this machete
*Van pulls away with quite a quickness*

machete

by RET on Sep 22, 2004 14:32:35

A chunk of sharp metal fitted with a handle that would cause any poor bastard a world of pain

Example:
did you know jason has a machete

machete

by Anonymous on Jun 06, 2003 11:19:06

machete:an alternate word for the men with big wangs, usually used to cut the hyman in a virgins vigina by method of penetration.

Example:

machete

by fat cobra on Apr 28, 2007 12:04:52

when a man is about to ejaculate, he pulls out of her anus and in a chopping motion slaps the girl in the face as he is ejaculating.

Example:
hey dude, i got pissed off at your mom yesterday so i went ahead and gave her a machete.

Machete

by OneFuckingMachete on Oct 03, 2019 09:40:04

A long dick- I mean, a long metal sword that is longer than a pen- I mean knife. It is often use for se- hunting!! It can cut through as- grass.

Example:
I stabbed my retarded friend with a machete

Machete

by ltdelicious on May 04, 2009 13:19:27

a long knife, used for hacking your way through the jungle. also the most awesome zombie killing tool ever.

Example:
Shit, theres zombies outside. wheres my machete

macheted

by rustyspikeshackleford on Mar 21, 2011 13:54:13

To have a threesome with a girl and her mother. Usually done in a pool while being recorded with a video camera.

Example:
I went to her house this weekend and macheted her and her mom.

Machete

by skown on Feb 19, 2011 09:45:24

Machete is the most bad ass movie ever created. It is about Machete, and ex-Federale who is a legend to all Mexican-Americans, being betrayed by a company who hired him off of the street to assassinate Senator John McLaughlin. All out war is declared and Machete's Mexican-American army kick some fucking balls off. Also includes Lyndsay Lohan's tits.

Example:
Guy 1-Dude! Did you see Machete?

Guy 2- Hell ya! I jerked off so hard to Lindsay Lohan's tits!

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