1. Very hot girls.
2. Very smart girls.
3. Very cheap girls.
4. Girls from Israel
5. Girls whose Mother is a Jewish girl.

Type One: The Suburbanite.
A kind, modestly curvy family girl who loves Judaism, her family, and the American Dream of a nice house in the suburbs. She has frizzy hair (likely dark brown/black), a prominent but rarely gargantuan nose, and just enough junk in the trunk to suggest she bites a bagel every once in a while. Well-educated but not intellectually cutting, she smiles sweetly and dishes out the kugel to beaming grandparents and that awkward future-investment-banker 16-year-old at the table who can't wait to settle down in 10 years and marry her.

Type Two: The City Slicker
While perhaps similar in appearance to the Suburbanite, there is also the Nice Jewish Girl in denial, often living in NY or LA. She may seem to be the epitome of mainstream urban chic, but there is an excellent chance she went to Jewish private school and/or Jewish summer camp. She may have highlights, a nose job and a personal trainer, maybe even a goyfriend (oy!), but she secretly yearns to settle down and always gives Bubbe a kiss on Sundays.

Type Three: The Zionist
This Nice Jewish Girl is earthy, smelly, and hairy. More than an Israel supporter, the Type Three NJG is full-blown Kosher Granola. She has long dark hair which may have been styled into dreads at one point, she is a vegan, she experiments with the women and closes her eyes uneccessarily throughout her entire version of a Hebrew service, which is somewhere between Prince of Egypt and the Exorcist. This NJG is pierced, political, and probably moving out to the kibbutz for 10 years and counting.

Overriding Rule: Despite their differences in plastic surgery and sexual preference, all Nice Jewish Girls have defining physical characteristics and eventually make their parents happy. Shalom.

THE DOWN-LOW JEWISH GIRL LOVES TO MASQUERADE AS A "WHITE GIRL" (AS IN WHITE GENTILE GIRL). THE DLJG LOVES TO HIDE BEHIND THE "WHITE GIRL" LABEL, SO SHE CAN PROMOTE INTERRACIAL SEX AND BABIES WITH BLACK GUYS (OR HISPANIC AND ASIAN GUYS). YOUR TYPICAL DLJG WILL GET A NOSEJOB, DYE HER HAIR BLONDE OR SOME OTHER COLOR, AND WILL TRY AND MIMIC A "WHITE GENTILE GIRL" PERSONALITY. YOU'LL SEE A DLJG IN MANY SOCIAL MEDIA VIDEOS GETTIN' JIGGY WITH A BLACK BABY DICK BRUTHA, OR SOME OTHER "MINORITY" WITH A SMALL DICK:). YOU'LL ALSO SEE A DLJG IN VIDEOS TRYING TO START RACIAL HATRED BETWEEN GROUPS (LIKE THE ONE WHO MADE A VIDEO A WHILE BACK INSULTING ASIAN COLLEGE STUDENTS). SO BEWARE TO ALL GUYS OF ALL RACES: NEXT TIME YOU SEE A "WHITE GIRL" IN A VIDEO GETTIN' HER SWIRL ON OR SAYING SOMETHING RACIALLY INSULTING, THERE'S A 70 TO 90 PERCENT CHANCE YOU'RE LOOKIN' AT A DOWN-LOW JEWISH GIRL:). DON'T CONFUSE JEWISH GIRLS AND CAUCASIAN GENTILE GIRLS: THEY ARE NOT THE SAME. THANKS:)