bagel Definition| Urban Word Dictionary

bagel

two pieces of round bread, smashed together in a rude hushed manner.

bagel

by cakelo on Feb 13, 2010 14:57:29

another word for zero -- derived from the show Scrubs

Example:
“God is watching. How many times have you gotten laid this year?”— Janitor

“Bagel”— Todd

(making zero symbol with hand)

bagel

by Artemis Stonecutter on Aug 03, 2005 03:56:11

a highly tasty snack

Example:
jews make them very well

bagel

by chuffy_mcflannelslap on Oct 13, 2004 22:07:23

bagel (n) Holy food of the Jews.

Example:
Generic Rabbi: Ya call that a bagel? Sclomcka!

bagel

by Homer Simpson on Dec 27, 2004 22:48:27

A really old doughnut

Example:
Next time you ask for a "shmear" on that bagel, you should ask for sprinkles too. Why? A "hole" lot of cheating at the Kwik-E-Mart, that's why. Turns out that Apu is selling chewy week-old donuts -- from the bagel bin! Is nothing sacred? In this reporter's opinion, no.

bagel

by Gulstab on Aug 09, 2009 07:21:02

Long ago, when the doughnut was invented, the entirety of planet Earth rejoiced at the delicious iced pastry, until one day, somebody pointed out that it contained the word "ugh", which is commonly associated with horror and dismay. This eventually led to "doughnut" being shortened to "donut", all for the better. A bagel is a lesser donut. It effectively puts the "ugh" back in "doughnut" and should be avoided at all costs if a donut is available.

Example:
*Todd is about to put a bagel in his mouth when Sean cuts him off.*

Sean: Dude, we have donuts.

Todd: Thanks, Man. I owe you one.

*Todd eighty-sixes the bagel and grabs a donut.*

bagel

by CamBam! on Nov 21, 2004 10:37:26

Someone who is extremely cheap.

(Comes from the generic Jew characteristic of frugal, and the fact that all Jews love bagels)

Example:
Dude, don't be a bagel, I need the money for my enema!

bagel

by AssMonger on Sep 28, 2007 06:43:31

an inflamed anal scphinter muscle

Example:
that guy jus ass fucked me rough, now ive got a bagel

bagel

by vassia.69 on Oct 05, 2009 13:22:06

It means anything you want it to mean. Another word for cool, sick, or rad. Also can be used as a substitute for a swear word when expressing anxiety or anger.

Example:
That was sooo freggin' bagel.

bagel

by regan on Jan 04, 2005 11:49:46

so drunk that you're toasted...another word for being toasted.

Example:
Man I drank so much last night. I was totally bagel!

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