Britain
A lazy, controlling police state.No free speech exists, you can be threatened with arrest for making fun of mugshots.You're TOLD not to say anything offensive to scum who threw a cat into a reservoir.You can be insulted & threatened online by morons from another country,but if you return words, you break a law called "Malicious Communications".Then you're arrested & punished, even just by calling someone a cunt. Whoever posted thedefinition of that law on here got it spot on, "soon be illegal to boo someone in the street"it already happened. People got arrested for what basically amounts to booing the new king.Flats pop up everywhere with druggies, yobs & foreign gang members.Teens harass people in the street, police just relocate them. Can't they be useful? Oh I'm sorry, they're too busy taking golliwogs from windows, or arresting someone for hurting someone's feelings on the internet, exercising their sad little powers of bullshit.People say fuck all day long, even in front of kids like a moron, making the word lose its impact, but offend someone with a racial slur (that only works one way) or say cunt, it's suddenly like you're a criminal.Why don't you see police interview videos of these "Malicious Communications" arrests?Because the country would look the utter shitshow that it really is!Naysayer: What a load of hyperbolic nonsense.Yes I'm sure Rowan Atkinson did a talk about freedom of speech all for nothing, easily findable on YouTube.Britain
Example:
Britain
A place Justin Beiber got (mentally) kicked out of. First he was bared from Manchester's Sankeys, and then he fought a camera man. Lucky for Justin his bodyguards prevented him getting frimponged by putting him into his baby-seat in the back of the car Justin was using to get about the UK.
Example:
Canadian: "Where did Justin Bieber get kicked out of again?"
British Person: "It was Britain, HAR HAR"
Canadian: "HAR HAR, THAT IS A FUNNY THING!"
Canadian: "Where did Justin Bieber get kicked out of again?"
British Person: "It was Britain, HAR HAR"
Canadian: "HAR HAR, THAT IS A FUNNY THING!"
Britain
aka England.(to the very ignorant)
aka Chavland. (to the British)
aka Scotland. ("Fucking Britain! I'm fucking scottish" said jock)
Now im not writing this defination to boast about how great, britain is. All of you already know about this and the name of Great Britain further emphazises the greatness.
I am also writing this to give misguided souls a true discription of Great Britain and to spell out common misconceptions.
Misconception
No 1: Britain and England are not the same thing.
England is England. Are we all catching that?
Great Britain is England, Scotland and Wales.
No 2: Not all British look like the "back end of a bus" (ugly)
Apart from myself and Price Charles that is.
No 3: Tony Blair is not a Wanker.
He is a tosser. (To the non-britons and idiots among you they are both detrogatory comments)
No 4: We dont all have crumpets at tea time.
Scones are favoured accompainment to a lovely Earl Gray.
In this short space of time you have now grown accustomed to Britain's traditions. I will now provide a translation for tourists on holiday to sunny Britain;
football = soccer
oh bollocks = oh shit
a bit of crumpet = a good looking girl
arseholes = assholes or alternatly the french
french = frogs or dirty bastards
"Come on them!" = "you my friend are ever so obnoxious and now you feel my wrath with the old traditional british duel. Jeeves fetch my dueling pistols!"
I am sure all of you will agree that these translations will certainly allow you to communicate more fluently with the average Briton. May i also add the last phrase; "Come on them" works most effectively with a cockney, scouse, brummy, geordie or scottish accent. Don't say it in the queen's english you will sound like a ponce.
I now come to end of my explantion for now i bid you farewell. And may God (who is British) jolly well bless you old chaps.
(I wonder if anyone has a sence of irony or pathetic fallacy)
aka Chavland. (to the British)
aka Scotland. ("Fucking Britain! I'm fucking scottish" said jock)
Now im not writing this defination to boast about how great, britain is. All of you already know about this and the name of Great Britain further emphazises the greatness.
I am also writing this to give misguided souls a true discription of Great Britain and to spell out common misconceptions.
Misconception
No 1: Britain and England are not the same thing.
England is England. Are we all catching that?
Great Britain is England, Scotland and Wales.
No 2: Not all British look like the "back end of a bus" (ugly)
Apart from myself and Price Charles that is.
No 3: Tony Blair is not a Wanker.
He is a tosser. (To the non-britons and idiots among you they are both detrogatory comments)
No 4: We dont all have crumpets at tea time.
Scones are favoured accompainment to a lovely Earl Gray.
In this short space of time you have now grown accustomed to Britain's traditions. I will now provide a translation for tourists on holiday to sunny Britain;
football = soccer
oh bollocks = oh shit
a bit of crumpet = a good looking girl
arseholes = assholes or alternatly the french
french = frogs or dirty bastards
"Come on them!" = "you my friend are ever so obnoxious and now you feel my wrath with the old traditional british duel. Jeeves fetch my dueling pistols!"
I am sure all of you will agree that these translations will certainly allow you to communicate more fluently with the average Briton. May i also add the last phrase; "Come on them" works most effectively with a cockney, scouse, brummy, geordie or scottish accent. Don't say it in the queen's english you will sound like a ponce.
I now come to end of my explantion for now i bid you farewell. And may God (who is British) jolly well bless you old chaps.
(I wonder if anyone has a sence of irony or pathetic fallacy)
Example:
"Of course God is British, the bible's written in english"
Please don't start sending me hate mail about how the bible was originally written in latin. Or if you don't believe in a God. Or if alternatly believe in Allah, or them indian Gods or if you are currently intoxicated and believe you are God and that you can fly etc.
"God save the Queen and Britain"
"Of course God is British, the bible's written in english"
Please don't start sending me hate mail about how the bible was originally written in latin. Or if you don't believe in a God. Or if alternatly believe in Allah, or them indian Gods or if you are currently intoxicated and believe you are God and that you can fly etc.
"God save the Queen and Britain"
Britain
Perrenial over achievers
Example:
The British Empire,was largest ever by land mass and population(do your research deniers).The English language most wideley spoken(it is the global language).5th largest GDP from the 22nd largest population.7 out of the top 22 music acts of all time(the Us has 5) again out of our meagre population(Beatles,Bee Gees,Cliff Richard,Elton John,Led Zep,Pink Floyd,The Rolling Stones).We are not world leaders in many sports but we punch above our weight in many(not just sports we invented and only we play and then call our finals "world series").And by the way for the above Yank I think you will find nobody invented Electricity and the Germans invented the first decent internal combustion motor car.to finish Britain is indeed great because it consistantly punches above its weight in so many different areas like no other country.Biggest is not always best.
The British Empire,was largest ever by land mass and population(do your research deniers).The English language most wideley spoken(it is the global language).5th largest GDP from the 22nd largest population.7 out of the top 22 music acts of all time(the Us has 5) again out of our meagre population(Beatles,Bee Gees,Cliff Richard,Elton John,Led Zep,Pink Floyd,The Rolling Stones).We are not world leaders in many sports but we punch above our weight in many(not just sports we invented and only we play and then call our finals "world series").And by the way for the above Yank I think you will find nobody invented Electricity and the Germans invented the first decent internal combustion motor car.to finish Britain is indeed great because it consistantly punches above its weight in so many different areas like no other country.Biggest is not always best.
Britain
Composed of England, Scotland, Wales and NORTHERN Ireland (yes, NORTHERN Ireland, as IRELAND is NOT part of Britain), Britain is not to be confused with England, a mistake which Americans usually make, usually due to their ignorance.
There is no such accent as a 'British' accent, unless you can do an English, Welsh, Scottish and Northern Irish accent all at once, including all the different towns and cities with their indivudual accents.
There is no such accent as a 'British' accent, unless you can do an English, Welsh, Scottish and Northern Irish accent all at once, including all the different towns and cities with their indivudual accents.
Example:
Remember;
It's BRITAIN not ENGLAND
Britain is composed of Northern Ireland, England, Scotland and Wales
It's NORTHERN IRELAND not IRELAND
Remember;
It's BRITAIN not ENGLAND
Britain is composed of Northern Ireland, England, Scotland and Wales
It's NORTHERN IRELAND not IRELAND
Britain
A wonderful country that is NOT full of:
1) Bad food (thats a steryotype made after W.W.II when Britain went into a depression)
2) Bad teeth
3) Crumpets (even though they are nice, biscuits and scones are a much more popular tea-treat)
4) "Crazy Accents and words" if americans wanted to use the ENGLISH language, they should not consider the original words and accent "weird"
5) Full of stuck-up bastards, I happen to have lived in England for the first 11 years of my life, and having a foreign family and living in a lower middle class did not mean i was ever insulted by people or made to feel unloved, i truly love the countries (plural) of britain
I also now live in America. Even though i did mention America before, I do think this is a great country too. what happened to being freaking ALLIES?
1) Bad food (thats a steryotype made after W.W.II when Britain went into a depression)
2) Bad teeth
3) Crumpets (even though they are nice, biscuits and scones are a much more popular tea-treat)
4) "Crazy Accents and words" if americans wanted to use the ENGLISH language, they should not consider the original words and accent "weird"
5) Full of stuck-up bastards, I happen to have lived in England for the first 11 years of my life, and having a foreign family and living in a lower middle class did not mean i was ever insulted by people or made to feel unloved, i truly love the countries (plural) of britain
I also now live in America. Even though i did mention America before, I do think this is a great country too. what happened to being freaking ALLIES?
Britain
A country by which all others set their standards. For such a small nation it's economic and political power is immense. Most things that were worth inventing were invented by the British including football (soccer for you Yanks) and spotted Dick. God save the Queen!
Example:
Bill "Hey John, i think Britain is a much better country than the U.S."
John "I agree, it's not full of wankers for a start"
Bill "Hey John, i think Britain is a much better country than the U.S."
John "I agree, it's not full of wankers for a start"