Pennsylvania

A state that takes 5 hours to drive across if there's no construction, which means that it never takes less than 10 hours to drive through. Contains towns with names such as Paint, Tree, Elm, Intercourse, and Frackville. The scenery is quite nice, but very repetitive.



Pennsylvania
you know you're from Pennsylvania when...

You refer to where you're from as pee-ayy more often then pennsylvania
You go to the shore
You can't eat other states "philly cheese stakes" because they are not real cheese stakes.
Youse, Yinz, You Guys and Yinzer are totally normal and acceptable way to refer to someone
You understand no one goes to Hershey park for the chocolate
You know what "the state store" is
You know what a "crick" is
You dont find it weird to have parties in firehalls
You call it a Hoogie
It isn't uncommon to see a horse and buggie
You and pretty much everyone you know is some part german
You know that Pennsylvania Dutch are not actually dutch
Birch Beer is not Root Beer
You love Wawa if your from the east and Sheetz if your from the west
You know the Pennstate cheer
School closings due to snow take the radio stations a half an hour to finish, because just about every town has its own school district.
You know Reading and the Reading Railroad from Monopoly is pronounced "Redding"
You don't find it weird to have off school for the first day of hunting season
You can pronounce Wilkes-Barre, Galitzen, Carlisle, Lancaster, Lititz, Schuylkill, Lebanon, Emmaus, and Punxsutawney
You can spell all of the above towns
At least 5 people on your block have electric "candles" in all or most of their windows all year long
You can't go to a wedding without hearing the chicken dance
You pronounce Water as "wat-er" and "wood-er" interchangeably
Example:
We are proud to be from Pennsylvania.


Pennsylvania
Better than your state. Sure, the roads suck, but not as bad as parts of Kentucky. Sure, the people can be dumb, but not as dumb as in Alabama. Sure, the weather sucks, but not as badly as it does in Alaska. Yeah, okay, it's a little rural, and you have to buy your liquor in state stores, and there's no beaches, but at least we're not West Virginia. Or Iowa.

Plus, the Amish are cool, we make ketchup and chocolate, the Steelers used to be a decent team, and hey! we've got a town called Intercourse.
Example:
Pennsylvania has Intercourse. Your state doesn't.


Pennsylvania
The only place in the U.S. in which no matter how small a town is, there will always be at least two bars, even if there is not one other business.
Example:
No matter where you are in Pennsylvania, you can at least get a drink, even if you can't buy gas or groceries.


Pennsylvania
Literally meaning "Penn's Woods" but better defined by Democratic political strategist James Carville as "Philadelphia in the east, Pittsburgh in the west and Alabama in the middle!" Middle of the state jokingly referred to as "Pennsyltucky". Home of perpetual road construction and an important swing state in national politics. Powerball lottery state. Actually kinda nice.
Example:
If you want to win the White House, you must make a strong effort to win Pennsylvania.


Pennsylvania
A powerful state in the Eastern portion of the country. The Keystone State is made up of Pennsylvania proper and its external territories of Delaware and Southern New Jersey (hey, it has a friggin' sinister looking Keystone as its logo). The state is divided into three regions: 1.Philadelphia/East, 2. Pittsburgh/West, and the T- a solid GOP controlled, rural territory that is reminiscent of everywhere in Ohio outside of Cleveland. This state has the dubious distinction of having possibly the shittiest roads in the nation. From farting around outside Uniontown to the '40's era PA turnpike, you will never find shittier roads anywhere else. Also famous for being the home of the Delcaration of Independence, the Constitution, Heinz Ketchup, and freaky place names like Eighty-Four, Conshoshcockton, and King of Prussia (named for a bar).
Example:
I was lucky to survive that trip on the PA Turnpike.


Pennsylvania
A state in the northeastern United States. One of the first states. Its major cities are Philadelphia in the east and Pittsburgh in the west. Central PA is filled with beautiful countryside and the capital, Harrisburg, also to several Amish farms (go to Lancaster if you want to see a good example). Although PA doesn't have the best roads in the country, it is full of beautiful scenery and friendly people. It is also where our nation began. The Declaration of Independence was signed in Philadelphia, the nation's first capital, on July 4th, 1776. Other significant states to see if you like American history would be Massachusetts and Virginia, correct me if I missed one. I don't know much about Pittsburgh, I apologize, so could someone from Pittsburgh back me up?
Example:
I have lived in Pennsylvania all my life and plan to stay here if I don't go down South.

Go Flyers!!!!

IN CONGRESS, JULY 4, 1776
The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America

"When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation."

suck on that, California (and Florida too)


Pennsylvania
Hmm. No ones brought up the fact that us Pittsburghians have an awesome accent and talk 200 miles an hour. Pittsburghese i think its called. And the scenery is amazing. PA isnt completely taken over by industry, so you can see hills rolling on for miles. And ok, so there are a lot of weird places like Eighty-four where you get absolutely no cable or phone lines (I actually have friends who live there..), but I think the people here are a lot nicer than you think.
Example:
Visit PA and take some notes, eh?


Pennsylvania
To all of you clueless people who have written embelished versions of what you think my state is, you can now return to NJ and NY., its because of the influx from these to states that property taxes & crime has risen. If you find us in bad attitude it might be because you rude monied people are taking away a simple way of life. For the record NE PA has 2 new beautiful casinos, true roads are deplorable, thats why we in PA would like to see tolls on major highways so that all you NY & NJ commuters claiming part time resident status here in PA pay your fair share.
Example:
PENNSYLVANIA MORE THAN YOU IDIOTS THINK


Pennsylvania
Pennsylvania is underrated as a "shitty hick state". Well I know that may be true of the pittsbrugh area (even though they have awesome snowboarding mountains). Philadelphia is basically a little bit historic town and a lotta bit ghetto nation. Theres at least 2 gang shootings there a day. The suburbs of Pa are really the place to be though. I mean where else do you have rich kids, poor kids, dropouts, 11-year old seniors and drugs galore?! The weather is as unpredictable as whether or not your parents are having an affair. One day last year is snowed and the very next day the weather was 70 degrees and sunny. When I meet people out of state I usually hear things like, "Do you see the liberty bell every year for field trips?" "Are you amish?" and "Whats Wawa?" Myself, I have never seen the liberty bell and know that amish people wouldn't even go out of state due to lack of cars. As for Wawa, Pennsylvanians know its the greatest place ever invented. The amish are in Lancaster everyone knows that and there arent as many of them as people think. I don't know what to think of northern Pa, I'm starting to think it doesn't exist. I've lived here all my life and have never heard a thing about Northern Pa or met anyone who lived there. If you live there, let me know. As for the shitty roads, In the last 2 years Im pretty sure all the roads near my house have been ripped up and expanded somehow, so basically, yeah. Shitty roads. So far this is the only state I've ever seen where a hick-filled general store (which is awesome by the way) that is located less than a mile away from multi-million dollar mansions. I guess Pa is also notorious for Bam Margera. He makes appearances at Boarderline (a nearby skate park) and a lot of people say hes actually an asshole. The most annoying thing about Pennsylvania is probably Penn State. Supposedly, an awesome school, but obviously, brainwashes its students into obsessing over it. There are so many diehard Eagles and Steelers fans in this state, it is unheard of. Sure, we don't have beaches or hawt celebs, we have shitty roads and our sports teams suck, but we still own all.
Example:
Loser: "Dude, Pennsylvania is so lame."
Me: "Are there cannibalistic, child-stealing, rocksalt-shooting, circus-escaping, inbreeding clans of albinos in your state?!"
Loser: "..no"
Me: "Yeah, thats what I thought fuckface"


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