Homeland Security

A federal agency established after 9/11/2001 to carry on the work of the terrorists. They help us fear nature by taking over FEMA and diverting funds that would have been spent on hurricane relief to equip meter maids with assault rifles. Constant reminders to "report suspicious behavior" to the police have made us fear each other and criminalized social anxiety disorder. Thanks to their fine efforts, being too shy to ask a girl for sex is now as likely to get you investigated as asking a girl for sex.



homeland security
1) A strategic move on the part of the United States Government made to take away the rights guaranteed by the US Constitution and the Bill of Rights, and brought about by the 9-11 terrorist act, and the first step toward globalization of the planet resulting in the new world order, and a perpetual state of martial law in the new millennium.
Example:
see also- fucked, conspiracy, GW Bush, forced labor


homeland security
All actions taken by national, state and local governments, by the private sector, and by individuals to prevent a terrorist attack from happening, to protect a target from being hit, to respond aggressively and appropriately once a target is hit, and to recover after an attack.
Example:
The national government spends 30 billion dollars a year on homeland security programs. It spends more than 300 billion on department of defense projects.


homeland security
When niggas defend their turf like your mom guarding a sandwich... honkey
Example:
Don't touch my fried chicken, I'll get all homeland security on yo ass...


Department of Homeland Security
(US GOVERNMENT) Cabinet level position created by the Bush Administration in 2003. One of the most costly and poorly executed reorganizations in US history, it essentially blew hundreds of billions of dollars on unrelated and pointless government projects intended to reward members of congress who sided with the president.

The DHS budget's largest line items are:

*the Customs and Border Protection (CBP)-20%;

*the Federal Emergency Management Administration (FEMA)-19%;
*the Coast Guard (USCG; formerly part of the Department of Transportation {DOT})-18%;

*the Transportation Security Administration (TSA)-12%;

*Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE)-10%;

*Citizenship and Immigration Services (CIS)-5%.

(Percentages are of the FY 2011 DHS Budget--$57 billion
Example:
The Department of Homeland Security was created to bring most federally-controlled law enforcement bodies into one single, union-free, whistle-blower-free, department. Riders to the Homeland Security Act cost taxpayers billions in useless programs.


Office for Homeland Security
Government department with the job of making people insecure by getting cops to break into their homes.

A good example of Newspeak.
Example:
The far-right bigot in charge of this office, whose name I forget, is the same man who spent years trying to lynch Mumia Abu-Jamal and he's praised the Nazis as well.


Homeland Security Shitter
An individual who is characterized by an inability, or strong reluctance, to have a bowel movement in any location outside the individual's home.
Example:
Why is Grandpa Phil in such a hurry to leave the dinner?

I think he's a Homeland Security Shitter - nature is calling after the turkey dinner but he won't go here so he's in a hurry to drive back to Montreal.


Homeland Security Advisory System
a system of fear tactics to keep the uninformed, ignorant, and resistant masses under the government's control. The System is divided into 5 risk levels; Severe, High, elevated, guarded, and low. its rarely Low because there is WMDs and "insurgents" in Iraq. It is really convenient to raise the alert before a political event where there may be protestors-I mean terrorists.
Example:
The Homeland Security Advisory System was raised to orange August 1, 2004 weeks before the GOP convention.


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