NOT Verizon

A phone company that releases your private data to the government without a warrant, in violation of the 4th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution.When this story broke in October 2006 that Verizon was releasing private customer data of U.S. citizens under provisions the "USA Patriot Act}" without warrant, the company vociferously denied it. But in sworn Congressional testimony (reported in October 2007 in the New York Times), Verizon admitted it decided it could violate the Constitution TENS OF THOUSANDS OF TIMES since 2005, continued up to the present.The Bush administration is currently (Decemeber 2007) drafting a law that would protect Verizon, AT&T, and others against prosecution.



Verizoned
1. To announce a compelling item, service, or or event and subsequently fail to follow through on delivering said thing.
Example:
"Man I totally Verizoned my girlfriend. I promised to go down on her, but we know that's not happening"
or

Yeah Apple really Verizoned us with the iPhone 4s.
or

They Verizoned the launch of the Galaxy Nexus, Droid 4... etc.


Verizon
American telecom service provider known primarily for getting only two things right: its network and its money. Best choice for those who have money to blow and often desperately 'need' to access Facebook in the boonies
Example:
Damn it, my daughter blew through 40 GB of data with our Verizon service, she knows good and damn well that shit costs extra!


verizon
A large corporation that grossly overcharges you without warning, only for you to find out on the next monthly bill. When you try to call to fix it you are, of course, forwarded to "John in customer service" who is really Akhmed in India.
Example:
*with heavy Indian accent* "Hello, this is John from Verizon customer service taking your call. How may I help you?"

"(profanity)..."


Verizon
A place where you buy phones, tablets, iPads etc they sell Android, Apple, Samsung. Some people say they sell the best electronics
Example:
William: Yo bro I just bought a new iPhone from Verizon!
John: Cool what version?
William: IPhone 12.


Verizon
an archaic company that trades in cable internet and phone service. they force you to stay with them for two years and for what? their packages and prices were reasonable by 2002 standards but now as they are being surpassed by every other company they just start derping while the competition leaves them in the dust.

their cable package has no local news and everything is extra. their dvr service is shoddy and expensive. their phone service is a different amount every month and leaves you to guesstimate how much you want to use your phone.
the service plans are also laughable. they even charge for toll free calls. that being said, they do have excellent coverage, but living on the east coast (or anywhere but the rockies) I can get service just as good with a sprint based network. also in canada and europe their service is piss poor.
Example:
1. bill: I just got fios at my house! lets watch hbo.
later: WTF? I have to buy all the good stuff a la carte what a rip off
2. mike: aaah now to watch the ren and stimpy episode I recorded on my dvr last night.
what the hell? my dvr stopped working again? that's the third time this week
3. ted: now to see how that labor strike played out.
where's my local news? oh that's right I switched to verizon. now all I get is national news that doesn't cover my home state at all.
4. verizon derpshit: Duuuh look I got me a verizon phone, all I had to do was agree to their outrageous prices for two years, Now I gets to buy as many minutes as I want every month and I gets two whole gigabytes of data. that's a lot. I can also call any ten people I want without using minutes.
me: wow two whole gigabytes, that will get you about twenty minutes on youtube. have fun sophies choiceing your friends
verizon derpshit: but I gets service anywhere in the US
Me: we live on the east coast, where dropped calls went out like the dodo bird.
5.random guy: I was on a conference call for work and now I get stuck with a $150 dollar overage? they assured me it was toll free.
customer service drone: (with trollface on) sorry, but we charge for toll free calls. (this actually happened to me)

Verizon blows. anyone else will give you better cell service. since leaving, I can call anyone without using minutes, and get a consistent bill every month. coverage is never a problem.


Not Verizon
After the great telecom merger of 2005/2006, to combat the voice over ip menace brought forth by the cable companies, one company made up of parts from Southwestern Bell, Bell South, and AT&T emerged controlling 85% of all telephone lines in the USA. This leaves only 2 telephone companies in america, Verizon, and NOT Verizon. The name was chosen for simplicity sake, as now everybody knows what company your talking about.
Example:
I just upgraded my DSL package.
Oh? Whos your provider.
South western.... no they changed their name to AT&T... and bought Bell... I forget?
Oh, you mean NOT Verizon. Ya i saw that package, looks good.


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