Verizon

A phone company that releases your private data to the government without a warrant, in violation of the 4th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution.When this story broke in October 2006 that Verizon was releasing private customer data of U.S. citizens under provisions the "USA Patriot Act}" without warrant, the company vociferously denied it. But in sworn Congressional testimony (reported in October 2007 in the New York Times), Verizon admitted it decided it could violate the Constitution TENS OF THOUSANDS OF TIMES since 2005, continued up to the present.The Bush administration is currently (Decemeber 2007) drafting a law that would protect Verizon, AT&T, and others against prosecution.



Verizon

by assmennfiossa on Dec 20, 2014 16:29:31

American telecom service provider known primarily for getting only two things right: its network and its money. Best choice for those who have money to blow and often desperately 'need' to access Facebook in the boonies
Example:
Damn it, my daughter blew through 40 GB of data with our Verizon service, she knows good and damn well that shit costs extra!


Verizon

by Reversed on Mar 31, 2022 03:13:42

A place where you buy phones, tablets, iPads etc they sell Android, Apple, Samsung. Some people say they sell the best electronics
Example:
William: Yo bro I just bought a new iPhone from Verizon!
John: Cool what version?
William: IPhone 12.


Verizon

by master of fire on Dec 07, 2011 09:40:35

an archaic company that trades in cable internet and phone service. they force you to stay with them for two years and for what? their packages and prices were reasonable by 2002 standards but now as they are being surpassed by every other company they just start derping while the competition leaves them in the dust.

their cable package has no local news and everything is extra. their dvr service is shoddy and expensive. their phone service is a different amount every month and leaves you to guesstimate how much you want to use your phone.
the service plans are also laughable. they even charge for toll free calls. that being said, they do have excellent coverage, but living on the east coast (or anywhere but the rockies) I can get service just as good with a sprint based network. also in canada and europe their service is piss poor.
Example:
1. bill: I just got fios at my house! lets watch hbo.
later: WTF? I have to buy all the good stuff a la carte what a rip off
2. mike: aaah now to watch the ren and stimpy episode I recorded on my dvr last night.
what the hell? my dvr stopped working again? that's the third time this week
3. ted: now to see how that labor strike played out.
where's my local news? oh that's right I switched to verizon. now all I get is national news that doesn't cover my home state at all.
4. verizon derpshit: Duuuh look I got me a verizon phone, all I had to do was agree to their outrageous prices for two years, Now I gets to buy as many minutes as I want every month and I gets two whole gigabytes of data. that's a lot. I can also call any ten people I want without using minutes.
me: wow two whole gigabytes, that will get you about twenty minutes on youtube. have fun sophies choiceing your friends
verizon derpshit: but I gets service anywhere in the US
Me: we live on the east coast, where dropped calls went out like the dodo bird.
5.random guy: I was on a conference call for work and now I get stuck with a $150 dollar overage? they assured me it was toll free.
customer service drone: (with trollface on) sorry, but we charge for toll free calls. (this actually happened to me)

Verizon blows. anyone else will give you better cell service. since leaving, I can call anyone without using minutes, and get a consistent bill every month. coverage is never a problem.


Verizon

by CallWaiting on Feb 01, 2009 09:34:24

A cell phone service provider that claims to have signal nearly everywhere. However, there is no signal in vaginas. (Seriously, if you don't believe me, try it!)
Example:
person 1: Okay I'm calling you!
person 2: You are?
person 1: Yeah, it's not ringing?
person 2: ...Nope. Dang Verizon.


Verizon

by Home slice on Aug 22, 2005 11:04:50

Like a shittier version of Comcast, however Verizon is a phone and DSL company, while Comcast provides cable television and internet services.

Verizon's cell phone technical support people are total n00bs, to the point where I know more about what's wrong than they do.

Verizon's DSL service has been reported to slow down below its rated 3.0 mbps speed, once you commit to a full year of the DSL service (to save approximately $15/month). If you search Google, you'll find many forums filled with frustrated people who have to wait forever to get through to tech support.

Verizon lures its customers into its DSL service by offering a low monthly price of $30/month (1 year commitment required) for service competitive to Comcast's 4 mbps, which is priced at $43/month.

Verizon lures cell phone customers by providing free in-network calling, and rebates on cell phone prices. They also say their service is the most reliable wireless network.
Example:
Verizon has a monopoly similar to Comcast's. Wouldn't it be funny if they merged and then you'd have even FEWER choices for internet access?


Verizon

by jerryblank on May 17, 2005 01:32:13

I rather use tin can phones then use their service. They have a dozen monkeys and a turtle in charge of their billing and thousands of towel heads working in customer service.
Example:
Friend-"Dude how'd you get that much money back"
Me-"Shh, because a dozen monkeys and a turtle are incharge of their billing."


Verizon

by Schmunzelmonster on Jan 20, 2007 18:12:01

Mathematically inept to the point of not knowing dollars from cents. For example, see the YouTube clips where a succession of Verizon employees demonstrate they do not know the difference.
Example:
Q. Why does anyone play the lottery at those odds?
A. They don't realise it's a tax on verizons.

Q. What does it mean when a footballer says he's going to give 110%?
A. No-one really knows. It's a thing verizons say when they want to sound keen and cool.


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