The Britains
A lazy, controlling police state.No free speech exists, you can be threatened with arrest for making fun of mugshots.You're TOLD not to say anything offensive to scum who threw a cat into a reservoir.You can be insulted & threatened online by morons from another country,but if you return words, you break a law called "Malicious Communications".Then you're arrested & punished, even just by calling someone a cunt. Whoever posted thedefinition of that law on here got it spot on, "soon be illegal to boo someone in the street"it already happened. People got arrested for what basically amounts to booing the new king.Flats pop up everywhere with druggies, yobs & foreign gang members.Teens harass people in the street, police just relocate them. Can't they be useful? Oh I'm sorry, they're too busy taking golliwogs from windows, or arresting someone for hurting someone's feelings on the internet, exercising their sad little powers of bullshit.People say fuck all day long, even in front of kids like a moron, making the word lose its impact, but offend someone with a racial slur (that only works one way) or say cunt, it's suddenly like you're a criminal.Why don't you see police interview videos of these "Malicious Communications" arrests?Because the country would look the utter shitshow that it really is!Naysayer: What a load of hyperbolic nonsense.Yes I'm sure Rowan Atkinson did a talk about freedom of speech all for nothing, easily findable on YouTube.Britain
Example:
britain
A nation that invented Football for the Brazilians, Cricket for the Aussies, Rugby for the Kiwis and Robbie Williams for the Gays
britain
Britain is a Sovereign state made up of Wales, Scotland and England. The superpower of the 19th century, Britain is still the fifth largest economy and owns (arguably) the 3rd most powerful armed force. Britain is home to almost 60 million people, 1/5th the size of the USA), or about the same as France and Italy.
Very small for it's population, Britain is one of the densest populated western nations. As the United Kingdom (including Northern Ireland), it is a member of the European Union.
Domestic problems in Northern Ireland have meant that Britain has had to deal with terrorism more frequently than most of its European counterparts. This issue has become less of a problem in the last 5 years, since the Northern Ireland assembly was set up and the IRA declared an indefinite cease-fire.
Once in possession of a number of Colonies, Britain now only holds a few smaller island colonies around the world.
Britain closest ally is still the USA, which it has held a special relationship with since the early 20th century.
Very small for it's population, Britain is one of the densest populated western nations. As the United Kingdom (including Northern Ireland), it is a member of the European Union.
Domestic problems in Northern Ireland have meant that Britain has had to deal with terrorism more frequently than most of its European counterparts. This issue has become less of a problem in the last 5 years, since the Northern Ireland assembly was set up and the IRA declared an indefinite cease-fire.
Once in possession of a number of Colonies, Britain now only holds a few smaller island colonies around the world.
Britain closest ally is still the USA, which it has held a special relationship with since the early 20th century.
Britain
A place Justin Beiber got (mentally) kicked out of. First he was bared from Manchester's Sankeys, and then he fought a camera man. Lucky for Justin his bodyguards prevented him getting frimponged by putting him into his baby-seat in the back of the car Justin was using to get about the UK.
Example:
Canadian: "Where did Justin Bieber get kicked out of again?"
British Person: "It was Britain, HAR HAR"
Canadian: "HAR HAR, THAT IS A FUNNY THING!"
Canadian: "Where did Justin Bieber get kicked out of again?"
British Person: "It was Britain, HAR HAR"
Canadian: "HAR HAR, THAT IS A FUNNY THING!"
Britain
aka England.(to the very ignorant)
aka Chavland. (to the British)
aka Scotland. ("Fucking Britain! I'm fucking scottish" said jock)
Now im not writing this defination to boast about how great, britain is. All of you already know about this and the name of Great Britain further emphazises the greatness.
I am also writing this to give misguided souls a true discription of Great Britain and to spell out common misconceptions.
Misconception
No 1: Britain and England are not the same thing.
England is England. Are we all catching that?
Great Britain is England, Scotland and Wales.
No 2: Not all British look like the "back end of a bus" (ugly)
Apart from myself and Price Charles that is.
No 3: Tony Blair is not a Wanker.
He is a tosser. (To the non-britons and idiots among you they are both detrogatory comments)
No 4: We dont all have crumpets at tea time.
Scones are favoured accompainment to a lovely Earl Gray.
In this short space of time you have now grown accustomed to Britain's traditions. I will now provide a translation for tourists on holiday to sunny Britain;
football = soccer
oh bollocks = oh shit
a bit of crumpet = a good looking girl
arseholes = assholes or alternatly the french
french = frogs or dirty bastards
"Come on them!" = "you my friend are ever so obnoxious and now you feel my wrath with the old traditional british duel. Jeeves fetch my dueling pistols!"
I am sure all of you will agree that these translations will certainly allow you to communicate more fluently with the average Briton. May i also add the last phrase; "Come on them" works most effectively with a cockney, scouse, brummy, geordie or scottish accent. Don't say it in the queen's english you will sound like a ponce.
I now come to end of my explantion for now i bid you farewell. And may God (who is British) jolly well bless you old chaps.
(I wonder if anyone has a sence of irony or pathetic fallacy)
aka Chavland. (to the British)
aka Scotland. ("Fucking Britain! I'm fucking scottish" said jock)
Now im not writing this defination to boast about how great, britain is. All of you already know about this and the name of Great Britain further emphazises the greatness.
I am also writing this to give misguided souls a true discription of Great Britain and to spell out common misconceptions.
Misconception
No 1: Britain and England are not the same thing.
England is England. Are we all catching that?
Great Britain is England, Scotland and Wales.
No 2: Not all British look like the "back end of a bus" (ugly)
Apart from myself and Price Charles that is.
No 3: Tony Blair is not a Wanker.
He is a tosser. (To the non-britons and idiots among you they are both detrogatory comments)
No 4: We dont all have crumpets at tea time.
Scones are favoured accompainment to a lovely Earl Gray.
In this short space of time you have now grown accustomed to Britain's traditions. I will now provide a translation for tourists on holiday to sunny Britain;
football = soccer
oh bollocks = oh shit
a bit of crumpet = a good looking girl
arseholes = assholes or alternatly the french
french = frogs or dirty bastards
"Come on them!" = "you my friend are ever so obnoxious and now you feel my wrath with the old traditional british duel. Jeeves fetch my dueling pistols!"
I am sure all of you will agree that these translations will certainly allow you to communicate more fluently with the average Briton. May i also add the last phrase; "Come on them" works most effectively with a cockney, scouse, brummy, geordie or scottish accent. Don't say it in the queen's english you will sound like a ponce.
I now come to end of my explantion for now i bid you farewell. And may God (who is British) jolly well bless you old chaps.
(I wonder if anyone has a sence of irony or pathetic fallacy)
Example:
"Of course God is British, the bible's written in english"
Please don't start sending me hate mail about how the bible was originally written in latin. Or if you don't believe in a God. Or if alternatly believe in Allah, or them indian Gods or if you are currently intoxicated and believe you are God and that you can fly etc.
"God save the Queen and Britain"
"Of course God is British, the bible's written in english"
Please don't start sending me hate mail about how the bible was originally written in latin. Or if you don't believe in a God. Or if alternatly believe in Allah, or them indian Gods or if you are currently intoxicated and believe you are God and that you can fly etc.
"God save the Queen and Britain"
Britain
Perrenial over achievers
Example:
The British Empire,was largest ever by land mass and population(do your research deniers).The English language most wideley spoken(it is the global language).5th largest GDP from the 22nd largest population.7 out of the top 22 music acts of all time(the Us has 5) again out of our meagre population(Beatles,Bee Gees,Cliff Richard,Elton John,Led Zep,Pink Floyd,The Rolling Stones).We are not world leaders in many sports but we punch above our weight in many(not just sports we invented and only we play and then call our finals "world series").And by the way for the above Yank I think you will find nobody invented Electricity and the Germans invented the first decent internal combustion motor car.to finish Britain is indeed great because it consistantly punches above its weight in so many different areas like no other country.Biggest is not always best.
The British Empire,was largest ever by land mass and population(do your research deniers).The English language most wideley spoken(it is the global language).5th largest GDP from the 22nd largest population.7 out of the top 22 music acts of all time(the Us has 5) again out of our meagre population(Beatles,Bee Gees,Cliff Richard,Elton John,Led Zep,Pink Floyd,The Rolling Stones).We are not world leaders in many sports but we punch above our weight in many(not just sports we invented and only we play and then call our finals "world series").And by the way for the above Yank I think you will find nobody invented Electricity and the Germans invented the first decent internal combustion motor car.to finish Britain is indeed great because it consistantly punches above its weight in so many different areas like no other country.Biggest is not always best.
britain
Britain - a country where it's normal for old men to stand outside the pub having a fag; straight men like sex with a fanny; engines are found under a bonnet; da hood is on the back of da coat; big booty goes on your big foot; dogging doesn't involve any canines; getting a good fisting means pain not pleasure; randy will never be a boys name; and we really love bums.
Example:
fag = cigarette, fanny = vagina, bonnet=car hood, dogging=outdoor group voyeur sex, fisting=punch, randy=aroused, bums=ass. Britain, Britain, Britain
fag = cigarette, fanny = vagina, bonnet=car hood, dogging=outdoor group voyeur sex, fisting=punch, randy=aroused, bums=ass. Britain, Britain, Britain
for Britain!
Used sarcastically/mokingly: When someone does something so well or often that they could represent Britain in the Olympics (or other national event) if the activity that they are good at were an Olympic sport or similar.
Example:
"Kate shops for Britain!", "I know she spent a whole day trying on shoes!"
"Chris sleeps for Britain!", "I know he didn't get up til 3 in the afternoon."
"Kate shops for Britain!", "I know she spent a whole day trying on shoes!"
"Chris sleeps for Britain!", "I know he didn't get up til 3 in the afternoon."