US history

Something the average person in the United States doesn't know anything about!



AP US History
A class that's really not as hard as it seems, that is, after you've been raped by the villain and left impregnated. A child shall be born unto you and its name shall be success. After that, it's all about reading and listening. You could, however, get an abortion (i.e. fail) but this is just as mentally, physically, and emotionally scarring as pushing through to give your baby a good life, a better life, so just keep that baby. You'll cry at night, cry in the morning, and cry tears of joy when that baby is a fully grown 5 on the exam.

Ask questions about shit that ISN'T ALREADY EXPLAINED IN THE BOOK (that includes YOU Fucknuts) and study all the time!
Example:
Rookie: "I'm in AP US History. It's SOOOO Hard! Can you help me study?"
Veteran: "Fuck no."


AP US History
A course designed to cause brain implosion/explosion immediately before finals and AP test. Topics covered include everything from 1500 to today. Students sit and listen to lectures during class daydreaming about how death must be much better than AP US History. Students are expected to fail tests and teachers will give no curves. Scoring below 50% on an all multiple-choice test is common. Three-hundred or more vocabulary words are required every week or so - and if you split the work with other students, the teacher turns psychobitch about it. Busy work is common and students spend 3-4 hours per night on it, provided they want to pass the class. The average student continues the work for about 9-18 weeks then decides he/she doesn't give a damn anymore.
Example:
On May 19, 1775, Ben Franklin was wearing what color shirt?

"Today we are gathered here to remember a beloved student, whose suicide was caused by stress in AP US History..."

"We will have a test every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, a project every week, and 2-3 DBQs and essays per week."


Ap us history
-A class that you only take solely to boost your GPA, although many people's GPAs decrease substantially
-A class to prepare you for the AP exam that probably 35% of the student population passes in the United States depending on the teacher you have.
-Students copy tidbit information off AP notes without actually retaining any substance because it's boring and putting it eloquently,sucks balls.
Example:
Bacon's Rebellion is so enthralling theres a chance that I could potentially joygasm

When in AP Us History I learn information that I am going to use in the real world and the rest of my life.


AP US History
A fun class if you're decently intelligent and you enjoy history. Otherwise it's hell on Earth. Most teachers are like the 1850s slave-drivers you'll read about and make you take several HARD tests every week. It's typical for about a quarter of the class to fail these even though they bum-studied for 10 hours the night before.
Example:
Haha suckas, I got a 94 in AP US History and a 5 on the exam. I was also the first person at our school in 6 years to get a 100% on a test. That's how BS the tests are.

Bob: "Hey Ron, how'd you do on the History test?"

Ron: "I got a 78! Whoo!"

Bob: "Nice man!" *high fives*

Bob and Ron aren't your average scene-kid slackers who don't give a shit, they're diligent AP students. No exaggeration there! I got a 78 once and was completely euphoric.


ap us history
The most boring class you could ever take in high school. your chances of passing it are next to none. do not take us history if you dont already have a 5.0 gpa from taking all honors classes since your freshman year, you hate studying, and your writing skills suck. You are guaranteed to fail if you cannot write a paper. Even practice DBQ's are impossible to pass. youre not even writing the paper and you cant pass! if you choose apush you are screwed in the ass. boring lectures where you take useless notes because theyre not even on the damn test. you wont pass the test unless you study your stupid ID's. yeah, those things that you write who, what, when, where, why and how for a whopping list of sixty things, which takes you about six hours to get through unless you actually have friends. GOOD LUCK. you wont pass one test unless you actually read the sixteen chapters assigned two days before. GOOD FUCKING LUCK.
Example:
"do you want to go white water rafting this weekend?"
"no, sorry i cant. im too busy studying for my ap us history test."


AP US History
Also known as APUSH.

A class where you learn to use historical events and facts to of USA to find a new name for your c rap teacher.

Class which consist of endless reading and outlining. A stressful kick in the nuts for the ones who did not listen to the advice of the past APUSH students. Sucks for you.
Example:
No example, I have to go finish my outline for AP US History.


ap us history
{ap us history}

A history class which is aimed for 10th or 11th graders to enhance their knowledge of our nations history and have them become scholars. It is also a good workout carrying the 20 textbooks and thousands of worksheets to class everyday to sit through boring lectures. Each week there is usually one or two tests taken on the main textbook given just to fuck over your grade, unless you find it worthwhile to study for 16 hours the night before. Every once in a while, you will be forced to write a dumb essay or DBQ over stupid topics from the past that is not really necessary to know. At the end of the year there is an AP exam which you can earn college credit on. That is the only reason why students take this class. Regular days are easy as you sit in a desk with a notebook listening about elections of the past and virtually everything to know about everything and everyone. Students are usually daydreaming at this time. Also, taking notes is made more boring due to the fact that you are learning things you take a test on 2 weeks prior to learning it. What is the point of taking a chapter 26 test when in class you are learning about chapter 21, which can be confusing. Only take ap us history if you want college credit, are a robot, or enjoy studying like a buckwild hog.
Example:
Q:Hey, are you in ap us history?
No, i have a life

Q:Whats up, lets get drunk today.
Sorry, no can do, i have to study for 5 hours to get a c on the test

Person 1:"Dude, lets go get some brain"
Person 2:"No, id rather learn about andrew johnson"

Person 1:"Oh my god, thats so sad the jews were killed in gas chambers"
Person 2:"I bet they would rather go out like that then take ap history"

gas chamber>ap history


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