Free beer

A myth older than the bible. There are many different versions depending on the country or area of the world but Free Beer has always been and continues to be a method of attracting people to lame events and or boring parties. It continues to be a tease because if anyone really did experience real true free beer in its purest form, chances are they got too drunk to remember it anyways.



free beer
a myth created by cruel, unfeeling people who live to torture myself and others of my gullible ilk
Example:
they spoke of free beer, but when I arrived I was told it was all gone


Free Beer
Free beer, free beer,
it's my favorite brand!
If I didn't have to buy it,
it's the best beer in the land!
WARM! FLAT! FUZZY!
It don't matter to me!
The best beer in this whole world,
is the one you buy for me!
Example:
It's a song. Sing it when you get free beer.


Guilt-free beer run
Done by underage males, a guilt free beer run is an average beer run except that the person committing said beer run slams down exact change or more than the cost of the beer on his way out. This means he will not have to show his ID yet doesn't feel guilty to the clerk for "stealing." This is a prime example of a situation in which everyone wins as the underage male gets his beer and the store clerk is paid the money owed but cannot be reasonably held responsible for allowing a minor to purchase said alcoholic commodity.
Example:
18 year old Doug: Here have a beer, we did a beer run earlier.

18 year old James: You're a dick! The poor attendant is going to have to pay for the missing merchandise!

18 year old Doug: Nah don't worry bro, it was a guilt-free beer run; I slammed down correct change on the counter as I ran out!

18 year old James: Oh ok, pass me a cold one then!


The Free Beer and Hot Wings Show
A hillarious radio show that broadcasts out of Grand Rapids, Michigan. It is hosted by Gregg "Free Beer" Daniels, Chris "Hot Wings" Michels, Eric (Zeitunian) Zane, and Joe "Producer Joe" Gassmann, Jr. It's the BEST radio show ever and WAY better than those Bob and Tom idiots. www.freebeerandhotwings.com Please Listen!!!
Example:
I was listening to The Free Beer and Hot Wings Show this morning and laughed so hard I burst a kidney.


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