bacon
n. Delicious strips of juicy, pork heaven. Served often at breakfast with eggs, but perfectly good served alone and at any time of day.bacon
The most beautiful of all meats. Its perfection is to such a degree that in Dante's "Divine Comedy", the highest level of heaven was described as being made from bacon.
According to numerous ancient texts, bacon is the divine force that prevents Chaos from destroying the universe. The primal gods needed food to supply them with the energy to create everything, and that food was bacon.
Nowadays, bacon can be prepared in numerous ways:
1) Fried
2) Raw (not recommended)
3) Smoked
4) Baked (like fried, but not greasy)
5) Caramelized (sugary bliss)
6) Covered in chocolate
7) Supplemented with lesser foods (as in filet mignon)
8) Milkshakes, ice creams, etc.
Essentially, bacon is the ambrosia of all foods. Without, mankind would descend into darkness and perish. To prevent this, bacon should be consumed once a week AT MINIMUM. Else, dire consequences would ensue.
There is a special place in Hell for those who despise bacon.
According to numerous ancient texts, bacon is the divine force that prevents Chaos from destroying the universe. The primal gods needed food to supply them with the energy to create everything, and that food was bacon.
Nowadays, bacon can be prepared in numerous ways:
1) Fried
2) Raw (not recommended)
3) Smoked
4) Baked (like fried, but not greasy)
5) Caramelized (sugary bliss)
6) Covered in chocolate
7) Supplemented with lesser foods (as in filet mignon)
8) Milkshakes, ice creams, etc.
Essentially, bacon is the ambrosia of all foods. Without, mankind would descend into darkness and perish. To prevent this, bacon should be consumed once a week AT MINIMUM. Else, dire consequences would ensue.
There is a special place in Hell for those who despise bacon.
Example:
A) The true reason that the Romans destroyed Jerusalem in the late 1st century CE was that the Jewish people refused to accept the Romans' gift of divine bacon.
B) "When you can't have sex, have bacon. When you can't have bacon, cry." -Every sane human. Ever.
C) Bacon is to meats as badonkadonk is to female anatomy.
A) The true reason that the Romans destroyed Jerusalem in the late 1st century CE was that the Jewish people refused to accept the Romans' gift of divine bacon.
B) "When you can't have sex, have bacon. When you can't have bacon, cry." -Every sane human. Ever.
C) Bacon is to meats as badonkadonk is to female anatomy.
bacon
this is the tasty treat that comes from the loveable animal the pig. bacon is good for everybody. it helps you store fat for the winter and is full of protein.
bacon
bacon
when put between 2 slices of bread with some sauce, it becomes lifes greatest pleasures.
it can also cure hunger, and it can stop war - if they used it as a weapon.
it can also cure hunger, and it can stop war - if they used it as a weapon.
bacon
bacon
Example:
(Tim eats some bacon, looks off to the right, falls down due to the orgasmical event of eating bacon)
Bob: Shit are you ok? (eats some bacon(joins Tim))
(Tim eats some bacon, looks off to the right, falls down due to the orgasmical event of eating bacon)
Bob: Shit are you ok? (eats some bacon(joins Tim))
bacon
The labia of the vagina.
Inner or outer and ranging in appearance from tiny and tidy, through streaky, to full medallions and at the extreme - pieces which someone has attempted to chew, choked on and had to be Heimliched and kept in hospital overnight as a precaution.
Inner or outer and ranging in appearance from tiny and tidy, through streaky, to full medallions and at the extreme - pieces which someone has attempted to chew, choked on and had to be Heimliched and kept in hospital overnight as a precaution.
Example:
I was reading the Victoria's Secret catalogue trying to pick my favourite model, one of them was far more beautiful than the rest but you could tell she had excessive bacon and it made the process so much more taxing.
I was reading the Victoria's Secret catalogue trying to pick my favourite model, one of them was far more beautiful than the rest but you could tell she had excessive bacon and it made the process so much more taxing.