configuring

A stupid idiot just like declan



Configure
The act of completely and immediately resolving a problem or issue of absolutely any given nature through pure brilliance and outstanding nerve. A rare phenomenon; typically native to a devestatingly attractive and intelligent individual, who pretty much just goes around fixing stuff. Like a boss.
Example:
"Dude. I don't know how you sorted that situation!"
"I know, at first it was a head-scratcher - but in the end I configured the hell out of it."


configurator
The person who does the configuration, design, programming, deployment and support of an application (that only 2 other people in the company understand) despite the best efforts of their project manager to really screw them around.

Also, far more than a BA.
Example:
He was the configurator as he did far more than just a BA despite the fact that TF was just an idiot who kept getting in the way.


configuration
To ask someone what their configuration is, is to ask them what side of the political train tracks they take. As in, left-wing or right-wing, republican or democrat, green or red, you know.
Example:
"You wanna join the Manchester Hippie Corps? What's your configuration?"

"Green green green. Like the perfect weed, my friend."


configuration masochism
Within the field of Information Technology, the act of implementing, possibly but not necessarily, good practice configurations without any business value just for the sake of using the available functionality and thereby creating the feeling of self satisfaction which has as the consequence that other involved parties are hindered in performing their day to day operations which invokes great frustration for said parties.
Example:
An architect suffering of configuration masochism designs the configuration of a totally private cloud instance in such a way that for each department in the company a small "firewalled" subnet is created while discarding the fact that in the end all services implemented by each department within their respective network segments have to communicate to each other in a non predictable way. Because of that an endless set of firewall and routing rules have to be created to make communication between these services possible which defeats the purpose of having firewalled network segments in the first place.


eyeballs out configuration
An eyeballs out configuration involves vehicles going backwards at a great velocity, causing the eyeballs to bulge out.
Example:
The centaur rocket propelled the spacecraft, in an eyeballs out configuration, causing the pilot's eyeballs to bulge out.


I configure that out
What you eye-twinklingly say when presented wif a "cranky-conundrum" situation which others are at a loss as to how to solve, but you are able to see a way out dat involves designing/altering one or more components in a certain way.
Example:
Cool dude #1, observing his electronics-nerd best friend strolling by his job-site, and waving him over to where he's puzzling over a power-cables array: Hey, Bud --- I'm trying to figger out about wiring up this circuit, but how to hook up da control-switches has me majorly scratchin' my head. Any ideas?
Cool dude #2, after briefly tracing da wiring and pondering a moment: Oh, yeah --- I configure that out. We just need a couple of relays in addition to your existing start-and-stop switches.


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