digestive

(Noun / Adjective) A woman who is just simply plain, no features of merit but not in any way ugly or repulsive either, just so ordinary as to be instantly forgotten, as soon as you look away. Very much similar to the type of biscuit also known as a digestive, from which this term originates.



Digestion
The process in the alimentary canal by which food is broken up physically, as by the action of the teeth, and chemically, as by the action of enzymes, and converted into a substance suitable for absorption and assimilation into the body.
Example:
Bill digestion his father after becoming a cannibal.


transverse digestion
An unfortunate birth defect whereby one’s digestive tract is reversed, causing one to eat with their ass and crap out of their mouth. The ass must be trained to chew food in the same manner as teeth. A serious side effect of transverse digestion is halitosis.
Example:
Derek: “Hey Mike, how come you never eat with us?”
Mike: “I didn’t want you to watch me eat with my transverse digestion condition.”
Derek: “So THAT’S why your breath stinks like shit!”


digestive nap
A nap one partakes in after a delightful, filling meal. This type of nap allows the body to prepare for digestion and the following defecation.
Example:
Paige, after eating a half-order of cheese fries, nine ounce filet mignon, house salad, and coconut prawns, decides that it is time to drop the Cosbys off at the pool. Before she can execute the drop-off, however, she enjoys a digestive nap to prepare her body.


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