Apollo 13

Noun. To shit oneself, specifically a disastrous venting of gas that requires an immediate return home.



Apollo 13
see also successful failure

Less then one year after man first walked on the moon Apollo 13 was simply a "routine" flight until a faulty thermostat caused an oxygen canister to explode, blowing an entire side of the spacecraft away, the ship eventally starts leaking oxygen and the crew (Jim Lovell, Jack Swigert, and Fred Haise) have to survive in the Lunar Module until they can safely make it back to earth. But they didn't get to play with moom rocks.
Example:
"Houston, we have a problem."


Apollo 13
1) The "successful accident" that took place on April 11, 1970 thru April 17 1970 where astronauts Jim Lovell, Fred Haise, and Jack Swigert had to jurry rig their Apollo spacecraft, using the LEM as a "life boat" after an explosion broke one of the oxygen tanks during liftoff

2) Similar to winging it, but you have at least some idea of what you're doing. "Pulling an Apollo 13"
Example:
1) Houston, we have a problem

2) Fuck, I forgot to study for the test. I'll just flip through my notes and pull an Apollo 13...


Apollo 13
Facing the ceiling on a bed or couch, placing you're feet on the wall and grab onto you're shirt for you will be in great turbulence after you rip one straight in your buddy's face.
Example:
You: Hey man I've gotta rip.
Friend: Go for it.
You: I wanna be a little more creative..
Friend: uhhhh...ok..WAIT...WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!?!
You: HAHAHAH i just Apollo 13ned your ass!


Apollo 13
noun - A condom filled with poop (deuce, shitlog, stinky brownsnake) or other assorted fecal forms that has been tied off at the end and frozen. Once frozen, It is used to penetrate the vagina, anus, or other bodily orifice in the same fashion as a dildo. Apollo 13's are commonly used in the spacedock community and other shit-related sexual deviancy circles.

Example:
I was just going to give her a traditional spacedock, but I remembered that I had a fresh Apollo 13 in my freezer. I used that on her vagina and saved my pending shit for a Cincinatti Steamer I delivered to her later that evening.


Apollo 13
Moments before an accidental Moon landing you fart releasing unexpected gases that change your original trajectory. Upon new trajectory you notice how close you were to a moon landing and jury-rig things out of your gym bag to get yourself out of the situation as fast as possible.
Example:
I was bending over in the locker room but I farted and stood back up. When I stood up I noticed the guy behind me had his Charlie Browns all in my face. So I grabbed my water bottle and a sock out of my gym bag and walked to the sink like I was fucking Macgyver and pulled an Apollo 13.


Apollo 13
A variation on Space Docking, Apollo 13 involves tilting a woman back on her shoulders after defecating in her vagina, causing her to expel the fecal matter out of her vagina onto her own face (if into her own mouth, see Apollo 11). The original defecator is then required to state, "Houston, we have a problem."
Example:
That girl was so nasty, she let me Apollo 13 her ass and then just fell asleep.


apollo 13
when you have to be resourceful and imaginative when confronted by a unexpected disaster . Using objects and resources at hand rather then what you really need.
Example:
On a road trip , in the middle of nowhere, your alternator dies but you have to keep going or risk dieing in the godforsaken place you find yourself. So you have to turn off the CD player, the heater, turn off the dash lights, unplug one of the headlights to conserve what juice the battery has stored in it to make to where the problem can be rectified.
As with the Apollo 13 astronauts when disaster struck them, using available resources to get home


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