Calm down

One of the most infuriating expressions in the English language. Using this expression is guaranteed to make the other person angry if he/she wasn't already.An invitation to someone to punch you in the face.



calm down
The term "calm down" is usually addressed to people who don't need to calm down at all, which makes it more funny.

Example:
person 1: heyy, whatsup?
person 2: oh myy goddd calm downn!
person 1: what the fuck? im calm!!


calm down
What a person of Jamaican decent says when he is asked to stop standing around with his hands in his pockets and help some customers.
Example:
Boss: "Suphel" please stop standing around with your hands in your pockets and help some customers.

"Suphel": Calm down, calm down, no need for the hostility.

Boss: What? I'm not being hostile. I'm telling you to do what I pay you to do.

((a little later))
"Suphel" (in H.R. office): Dat man needs to calm down and stop the picking on me. I do my job.

((next day))
Boss: "Suphel", what did I do to deserve being investigated?

"Suphel": Calm down, calm down. No need for the hostility, mahn.

Boss (exasperated): Fine, do whatever you want. But, so you know, reviews are coming up.

"Suphel": Calm down, calm down....


Calm Down
A simple phrase which means to relax and think clearly about ones current situation instead of reacting emotionally.
Also the most feared phrase among all women. They seem to believe when a man is telling them to "calm down", the man is asking for them to obey their every whim. When in truth, women simply seem to over think what's troubling them to the point of insanity. And in actuality, when a man says calm down to a women, it just means, "Hey, you seem a bit upset about nothing, can we just act civilized please? If not we can just go our separate ways, up to you."
Example:
Women : Trump is fucking disgusting, and Hillary is amazing.
Man : I mean I'm not a fan of Trump either, but Hillary is just as scummy as him, I mean, look at all the secrets she keeps, and all the shady stuff she does behind the peoples backs.
Women : WTF is that suppose to mean? YOU DONT LIKE HILLARY!! WHAT DO YOU HATE FEMINISM TOO!!! REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
Man : Please, may you calm down?
Women : REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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