English Teacher

Will analyze the shit out of any classic novel or Poem. Seriously, someone could write 'Immy took a book' and an English teacher would think 'oh wow the word 'Immy' is spelt in a way to symbolize political incorrectness...' I don't know how they do it, but they take things so out of context. Coincidentally, context is one of their favourite things in the world. Other than Shakespeare, of course.



English Teacher
Empty bags of air, mostly, who kill great works of literature by being super boring and lame. All except that one who taught you about life and how to live it.
Example:
Today my English teacher made us make papier-mâché masks representing Hamlet’s antic disposition or some shit like that....idk, I have an A.


English Teacher
A nasty bitch who purposefully gets pregnant to wag school and smoke blunts while students have to deal with a cunt of a relief teacher for months.
Example:
"Jesus, Mrs. Stevenson is such an English Teacher, What A Nasty Bitch" "IKR, I Heard She A Prossie Downtown for the state housing gang"


English Teacher
Every single English Teacher is a waste of space and is a waste of time apart from two. The two good English Teachers are usually female. when you meet the first English Teacher they will seem funny, polite and nice; but really they are horrible, discouraging and rude people, and don't get me started on the Head of English.
Example:
"Oh my god, the English Teachers today, just turning around on me like that jeez, I'm so fed up of them. Can't believe they would just quick me out my class and tutor like that."
"Today was horrible, I had English, and my English Teacher just made ten times worse that it already worse: first accusing me of flirting with them secondly, shouting my name out in-front of everyone in class and just being there watching over everyone and making us do even more work on boring comers."


English Teacher
Every single English Teacher is a waste of space and is a waste of time apart from two. The two good English Teachers are usually female. when you meet the first English Teacher they will seem funny, polite and nice; but really they are horrible, discouraging and rude people, and don't get me started on the Head of English.
Example:
"Oh my god, the English Teachers today, just turning around on me like that jeez, I'm so fed up of them. Can't believe they would just quick me out my class and tutor like that."
"Today was horrible, I had English, and my English Teacher just made ten times worse that it already worse: first accusing me of flirting with them secondly, shouting my name out in-front of everyone in class and just being there watching over everyone and making us do even more work on boring comers."


English Teacher
Usually middle-aged men and women who have a self-written sci-fi series sitting in their desk drawers that no publishing company gives a shit about. Therefore, giving their students terrible grades helps fill up that depressing hole in their hearts. They also get a boner by thinking about how their perception of the book is far superior to anyone else’s. They typically over-analyze random speech in novels and make you feel like a dumbfuck while doing so. For example, if an author writes “The dog was sad.”, an English teacher would talk about how this is a reference to the revolutionary battle tactics of Napoleon. Meanwhile, the author really meant that the dog was just fucking sad. Despaired. Depressed. Whatever other synonyms. Case closed.
Example:
Kiss-ass Kelsie: Ms. Johnson is the best English teacher ever! She really helps emphasize the true need for literature to enrich our otherwise pointless lives.

Reasonable Ricky: Suck a fat one Kelsie and reflect on your life.


English Teacher
Didn't use her own clothing to look good in school or college, copied someone else's style. Likes a blow job. Drinks underage. Worries about her boyfriend and other woman and grabs on stuffed things at night. Only ever likes her hair long. Isn't conservative and maybe is even a fucking petafile. Her providers must pet her files. Talks about who's she's associated with to complete strangers. Is pushy and demanding. Cruel to vaginas and doesn't care to her own breath.
Example:
That English Teacher is going to ruin Philadelphia please let a male teacher work there instead.


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