The American Idol

The ideal sandwich maker who has great skill. Criteria includes: Ninjas who have a black belt with two purple stripes on it.This requires time, skill, practice, and patience.



American Idol
It's rigged. I mean think about it... over 60,000 people supposedly try out for it and yet they have so much early footage of people who make it to the top 12...

And they purposely let absolutely horrible singers through to see the judges, because mocking bad singers is a huge attraction to the show...

Also... notice the unusual balance of the runner ups and winners of the show... I mean first season... an attractive white young female wins - runner up is a young white male, then a large black male - runner up an geeky looking white male, then an average sized black female - runner up is a larger younger white female, then another attractive white female - runner up attractive white male, then an older white male - runner up a young white female.

In order to maintain this balance, I think the winner this year will be a young black male or female... and the only one who really matches this is Jordin Sparks. Go Jordin! Even if you were already selected to win, early on.

Despite being rigged though, it is pretty darn entertaining, if you don't have anything better to do.
Example:
GF: Hey, isn't American Idol is on...
ME: Who cares? Its as rigged as Boot Camp or Judge Judy.


American Idol
A show where singers compete to become the newest indentured servants to the RIAA, and to attempt to make other naive singers aspire to the same. The majority of the show's viewership comes from Simon Cowell's belief that making crude jokes about people that can't sing for shit constitutes constructive criticism.
Example:
I don't watch American Idol because I appreciate real music.


American Idol
An American television show that is part of a collective effort to perpetuate a shallow, one-dimensional view of music. Those with an ability to sing are given a chance at a record contract. Not specifically those with exceptional creative abilities, but those who are able to carry a tune through a verse-chorus-verse-Top 40-3:30 of regurgitated sound. It is made even more ominous by its rabid nation-wide following.
Example:
"It's time to evolve ideas. Evolution did not end with us growing thumbs, you do know that, right?" -- Bill Hicks

That example does not use "American Idol" in a sentence, but this does.


American Idol
1. A show where people with no talent go to pretend that they can sing.

2. A show where those who have talent but do not look the part cannot possibly win.

3. A show that a majority of America has sold their souls to.
Example:
Do you think that Susan Boyle will win on American Idol?

No, she has way too much talent and doesn't look like a porn star.


American idol
1.An completely useless show in which people try to raise publicity of themselves regardless of musical talent

2.An American who travels to many countries and has sexual intercourse with many partners without receiving a disease
Example:
I only watch American idol for the tryouts


American Idol
A pop-cultural phenomenon that is so disgustingly implanted into american culture, that's it's nearly impossible to escape.
A show with a similar appeal to your local open-mic night @ the cafe, the exception being that one or two people @ the open mic have at least a shred of musical talent, & are freely allowed to express it as musicians.
A show to help boost Intermix Media/Myspace, which Murdoch owns, by capturing the internet culture as well as the television drone nation, to create real competition for MTV,
& eventually corner the market on the net, once it becomes more corporate controlled, & politically restrictive, which it is well on it's way to becoming..

Example:
I can't even watch a ballgame without one of these American Idol sucks over-singing, off key, or flat renditions of God Bless America, or the national anthem.


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