Umbilical

A British term for the navel or "belly button" in the center of a human torso.



Umbilical Spit
A type of spit that usually occurs after being deyhydrated or after strenuous physical activity. The gum-like quality of the spit causes it to hang unceremoniously from your mouth in a long string of saliva, usually causing the victim to lean forward with their head away from their body and shaking erratically in an attempt to break the Umbilical Spit.
Example:
Friend: "John, why are you looking at the ground like that?
John: "I'm waiting out this massive umbilical spit"


Umbilical Whipped
A child who agrees with their mother on everything, and has not left home after, or during, their mid-twenties. Probably chats online with older women. Mother is most likely a Donald Trump supporter.
Example:
Where did Joe go? His mom called and he left. God! He's so umbilical whipped.

Where's Dan at? He's at the Republican primary. Oh. Yea.... umbilical whipped.


Umbilical Cable
An umbilical cord is how a fetus survives in the womb; its the pipe which gives everything a fetus needs to survive.

An umbilical cable is a bunch of cables held together or one big cable that resembles an umbilical cord. An umbilical cable transports vital data and/or electricity between things.
Example:
I opened my computer and I saw a bunch of umbilical cables!


umbilical leash
One of those baby restraints with a rope attached so as to prevent a child from running too far out of reach from his/her parental unit. Also known as the primitive version of GPS.
Example:
Baby Boy: Damn my stupid mother. She has locked me up in her outdoor jail with this stupid umbilical leash.
Baby Girl: That's too bad because if you could just take 3 steps further, I'll give you the time of your life.


umbilical dump
It's when you don't have to take a dump for days, then you visit your parents house, and you MUST take a dump. Even adult children are unaware this is happening but it's definitely umbilically connected. An umbilical dump.
Example:
Child: Hey Ma, I feel an umbilical dump coming on.
Ma: Oh shit, I have to clean the skidmarks out of the toilet again?? Another umbilical dump.


cut the umbilical cord
When a child's mother (usually the son) refuses to acknowledge the fact that "her baby" is growing up and will always try to be involved in whatever they do. This is most commonly seen in these three scenarios; 1) getting a driver's license 2) the first date 3) going off to college.
Example:
Mother: Oh, I just can't believe my little baby is finally going out on his first date. Do you think you'll be alright?
Son: Mom, I'm fine, just leave me alone. I'm 18 and I'm not a little kid anymore.
Father: Honey, just cut the umbilical cord already and let him go!


Umbilical Docking
When a man with a large gut (fufab) whose belly button hole is deep because he is so ginourmous takes another man's penis into that gapping umbilical hole.

This also allows the man who is the receiver to perform other activities.

Caution: the umbilical cavity should be checked for foreign objects prior to docking!
Example:
Sam could not dock with his gay lover because he couldn't find his penis due to his fufab so they improvised and did a little Umbilical Docking.

"Hey Buddy, just Umbilical Dock me while I finish this hot dog."


Aftermarket Umbilical Cord
When two people dreadlock their genital pubes with each other's, creating a bond as strong as the hair roots on each's upper genital area. Can also be called "Hairy Symbiote"
Example:
Bro1: I've been feeling so disconnected from the world recently...

Bro2 (down-to-earth guy): I'll help you back down bro, let's try the aftermarket umbilical cord"


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