Your Mum

See also: Your Mom, ya mum, Your Mother, Yo Momma1. A phrase used often in English youth culture as a generic comeback to an insult of any kind.2. A response to a question of any sort, often not being in any way related to the person whom is asking's mother or even making any sort of sense, although it can sometimes be fitting and even insulting.3. Used as part of a larger insult usually following the formula; "Your Mum's so 'x' she is 'y'." This form oftens plays to the target's mother's alledged promiscuity, weight, intellect, age, looks, wealth or background. This is the form of 'Your Mum' used by people with higher (if any) intellect.Be aware that many people, even if meant as a joke, find the 'Your Mum' insult just that; insulting, even to the point of violence.The 'Your Mum' insult may appear to be a recent phenomenon, but it has been used by even Shakespeare in his plays, as in Act I Scene 1 of 'Timon of Athens';Painter: Y'are a dog.Apemantus: Thy mother's of my generation. What's she, if I be a dog?The 'Your Mum' insult was also uses in Act IV, Scene II of Titus Andronicus;Demetrius: Villain, what hast thou done?Aaron: That which thou canst not undo.Chiron: Thou hast undone our mother.Aaron: Villain, I have done thy mother.



Your Mum
'Your Mum' is the original english version of the insult. The American readers among us will be more accustomed to 'Your Momma.' The insuslt can be added as a come back (though not a very good one) to any insult. The comeback does not have to be related in any way to the insult and can be completely incoherent.
Example:
This is an example of and incoherent version
'You such such a cock sucker'
'Your Mum.'
This is a coherent example
'Fuck you! You suck cock'
'So does your Mum'


Your Mum
Contrary to the above suggestions the term "your mum" is not actually officially an insult. In fact, in many situations it can be seen as a very honourable compliment. For example, if someone calls your mum a "hottie", you can revel in the knowledge that you were first out of all your friends to be in her (provided none of your friends have entered her previous to your birth, might be best to check first). Additionally, your mum might be called "loose" and a "fucking slag" which are street terms for being a good listener.

However, there are certainly usages which can be deemed offensive, as we can see below in the examples. In fact, the British government split the term into 5 classes in the "Your Mum" parliamentary act of 1923. Use of a level 5 can lead to unlimited fines and/or a prison sentence of 20 years. Community service for a level 4 usage is compulsory, servicing 40+ year old mums to 'keep them fresh'.

(History)

The term was first coined by early Christians after the Bible story in Bernard 3:19, in which Jesus is a teenager just beginning his forages into carpentry and the bush. In the account he is bullied by a gang of locals nicknamed 'The Disciplz', who continually shout abuse and throw pasties at his knees . Eventually, Jesus tires of the pastry-related insults and hits back with his best friend Foreskin, cornering the Disciplz and threatening them with a badger. His tormentors are reluctant to repent until Jesus speaks the most momentous words that possibly the whole world has ever heard...

"Your mothers are all very much like the Romans. They are strong, valiant and innovatice, and they all wear skirts that show their willies."

In the story the Disciplz immediately fall to their knees and pledge allegiance to Jesus, scratching their elbows with shortcake as was the age-old tradition and not leaving his side for 20 more years, not even to go to the loo.

Inevitably the usage grew from that point but the term has been somewhat tainted by popular culture and Richard and Judy. We can only pray that those who use it correctly shall be rewarded with the "Second Coming (Of Your Mum)"...
Example:
Level 1 - Much favoured usage in the Western world

'Your mum has a massive cock and I am going to stick it in my mouth and inflate her already huge face. She is a slag and you know it.'

Level 2 - A passable compliment

'I would love to take your mum out sometime and penetrate her, if that is ok with you'

Level 3 - Risky, preferably used behind closed doors

'Your mum likes chocolates because they are the same colour as my poo'

Level 4 - Offensive and nasty use - would make me cry

'Your mum is an idiot. She has the IQ of an elf.'

Level 5 - You must be a mental

'Your mum is a M*ll*rd Duck'


Your Mum
'Your mum' is a cuss originating presumably from one of the many ghettos in the UK. Mainly used by chavs, it is a comeback to an insult that cannot be beaten in any other way. Also used as an answer to almost any question, it is one of the most universal cuss downs of the twenty first century as of yet.
Example:
Initiating insult:'Shut up you ignoramus.'
Comeback:'Why don't you tell your mum to shut up!'

or

(someone pointing at a hippo in a zoo)Q:'What's that?'
A:'Your mum!'


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