blotto

Blind drunk, intoxicated to the extreme



blotto
Drunk. Other terms which mean 'drunk' are: intoxicated, pissed, smashed, Oliver Twist (rhyming slang), potted, soused, in your cups, off the wagon, slaughtered, hammered, wasted, shit-faced, squiffy, legless, sozzled, plastered, sloshed, inebriated, tipsy, tiddly, paralytic, tanked up, on the booze, on the piss, on the sauce
Example:
Wife: "You were the one who ended up blotto last night and introduced your dinner to the 'welcome' mat. You can wash it and then wring it out".

Man: "Right now I feel like it's my brain that needs wringing out".


blotto
describing a wild night of debauchery, an out of control situation, a crazy fucked up experience.
Example:
Dude - hookers, booze, blow, a baby goat!? - jesus christ last night was fucking blotto.


blotto box
Mostly intended as a joke, the "Blotto Box" was a theoretical device that would send too much electricity over phone lines, making it impossible for any calls to get through. Depending on who you ask, the Blotto Box is either impossible or would kill you when you turned it on. The intended effect is that every phone would "ring and ring and ring" in an entire area code.
Example:
Blue box, red box, blotto box: schematics for many small devices were distributed during the era of telephone phreaking, but not all of them worked as advertised.


blotto correct
Combination of "blotto" and "auto correct," describing the inaccuracies you make while explaining something to someone when you are totally wasted. This is like the mistakes that a smartphone makes when it auto corrects what you want to say with something totally weird, but you don't realize what you actually said until you see the text or email sometime later.
Example:
I wish I had an app for blotto correct. Last night I said some things I shouldn't have.


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