crew

A sport which takes up all excess time



crew
crew will wreck your life.

The initiation of a rower's journey begins when they set hands on a boat. You will carry a boat with others like you, and become astounded at how heavy this thing really is.

When all the oars are in, you may row arms only. Seems easy. then the back is added, then the legs. It seems okay. Only as the weeks go by do you realize the enormity of what you have gotten yourself into.

Your hands will bleed and ache and sting; it hurts to pick up a pencil sometimes. You are introduced to the ergometer, erg, or rowing machine- this machine is the finest example of torture in the modern world. Your hands will hurt worse, you will pull harder, you will vomit in trash cans and wobble on jelly legs to your car.

Finally, the hunger. There is no greater hunger than hunger after practice. You will eat anything and everything in sight.

But aside from the general pain, nausea, and discomfort associated with rowing- it will get you fit. You will meet new people that will change your life. You will work harder than you ever have and see results. You will do things that you have never dreamed of. You will fall in love with crew, only it's a weird kind of love. A certain comfort comes from smelling the boathouse on your clothes, stepping off of the erg and into the rainy outdoors, or crossing the finish line with boats behind you.
Example:
Rower: I can't, I have crew.
Non-rower: What's crew?
Rower: Rowing
Non-rower: *kayaking motion* I've been kayaking before!
Rower: I don't think you understand.

Cheerleader: I have practice until 5 today! Ugh!
Rower: *low growl*

Coach: Set up the ergs!
Rowers: I can't I broke my body

Mom: I think I made too much pasta
Rower: there is no such thing as too much pasta


crew
Crew (krü) n. 1. a sport practiced in rowing boats where the participants willfully awake before dawn and run to practice where they spend one to two hours sitting on a hard wood seat and pull on oars to such a level as to cause their bodies to go into oxygen debt, resulting in the formation of lactic acid in their blood, which causes substantial pain and discomfort in all major muscle groups. This activity is usually performed twice a day in the name of fun, and is conducted under the demonic supervision of a person called "Coach" with the help of his trained servant named "Coxswain".
Example:
Me: What are you up to spring break?
Kali: Going to texas with Crew. . .growl.


crew
the sport of gods, requires constant physical exertion, perfect poise, balance, timing, awareness, brute force, and a sensitive touch.
Example:
to err is human, to erg is devine


crew
A sport where you abuse your mind and body in the morning, mid day, and afternoon. It's not uncommon to find a rower keeled over and vomiting after a session on the ergometer.

Synonymous with torture.
Example:
Person A: Crew fucking sucks.
Person B: Don't you do crew?
Person A: What of it?


crew
One of the hardest most demanding sports that takes all your time and energy, and even though you may hate it with the passion of 100 million suns, you continue to do anyways.

A sport that causes friends, who do not row, of the athletes who participate in crew to want to slap the rower's face for complaining about how hard crew is than when they suggest they quit, just stare blankly back as if they are thinking, but thats not even a possibility.

This sport sucks, but will get you a great body, some great friends, into a good college, but otherwise it ruins your life.

Sport that elicits excessive muffin, bagel, and pasta consumption.

Rowers are hungry ALL THE TIME!!!

Rowers know --to erg= to kill yourself repeatedly
Example:
Rower: I hate crew, im so tired all the time, my grades suck and it sucks.
Non-rowing friend of rower: If you hate it s much, why don't you quit?
Rower: **Blank stare**

"muffin muffin muffin"

I just erged a 2K and i PR'd but it feels like my throat is bleeding


crew
A sport. It looks easy from the land but in reality it requires a LOT of technique, rhythm, focus, and down right power. If your hand movements are sloppy or every person in the boat is not together the boat will not move efficiently and you will exhaust your self for no reason. Crew is the kind of sport you really have to be devoted to and practice a LOT.
Example:
Bob wakes up early every weekend, and spends 4 hours every day at crew.
When Sally rows she gets the worst blisters, skin is literally ripped from her hands leaving painful, bleeding open wounds.
Kim rowed 25,000 meters yesterday on an erg. Today she can not walk because her legs, back, and arms are so sore.
Phil lost his voice when his cox box broke and he had to scream calls for the teams entire 3 hour on-the-water practice.
Kevin rowed so hard was over exerted and threw up at the end of the race.
That crew team is more like a family, i wish our soccer team cared about each other and loved their sport as much as those good looking crew kids do. I also wish i had sexy muscular legs and crazy good endurance like them.


crew
One of the most difficult and highly-underrated sports that man has ever created. Not only can it physically mess you up through the pain, but it can also socially mess you up. Unfortunately, "AP Crew" does not count as college credit, even if it takes up almost as much time as school, if not more. Because the rower's school social life is in shambles, the rower becomes better friends with his or her fellow members of the cult sport.
Example:
Joe: Are you coming to the party Friday?
Mike: Sorry, I got crew.
Joe: How about Saturday?
Mike: There's a regatta all day.
Joe: That blows.
Mike: It sure does.

Sra. Martinez: ¡Jaime! ¿Porque no hacía tu tarea?
Jaime: Lo siento, pero fue remano a crew ,Señora.
Sra. Martinez:¡No está una excusa! ¡Menos cinco puntos!
Jaime: ....perra estupida....

TRANSLATION
Señora Martinez: James! Why didn't you do your homework?
James: Sorry, but I was rowing at crew, Señora.
Señora Martinez: That's no excuse! Minus five points!
James: ....stupid bitch....


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