explosive diarrhea

Noun. Casually referred to by some as a "toilet tempest"; however, this is no casual matter.It is a serious condition that generally originates from the ingestion of Thai food that has not received an "A" on its recent health inspection examination. The first signs of the condition (i.e. flatulence to an instant need of new trousers) usually appear within 30 seconds to 6 hours after initial ingestion. Leave the premises in a hurry and find the nearest restroom. Sit down on the throne and push right through the initial traffic-jam. Think about popping the cork off a bottle of wine, it should soon start to flow. Like a storm. The term "toilet tempest" is derived thereof.After a fierce, epic battle with the tempest, the wine bottle is finally empty. Now proceed to use up a whole roll of Charmin® Ultra Soft, even with the 25% bonus amount that you get when you buy a Costco pack. In the end, your anus will be (at least) chapped and bleeding, so you decide to leave a few squares of toilet paper in your underwear to soak up excess blood.Well, upon trying to flush the toilet, you find that it has been clogged about 20 times over. Without your own plunger, you wash your hands (3 times) and leave the restroom. On the way out, you tell the janitor that there is a "surprise" waiting for him (of which he's already aware due to the stench that is peeling the paint off the walls). Finally, you go and find your friends and try to forget about the horrors that you've just experienced.



explosive diarrhea
A painful situation where you feel like a Monday Night Football game is going on inside your colon. Caused by large amounts of liqueous diarrhea (either pure liquid or big, wet, juicy chunks) which are propelled out of the large intestine by tremendous gas pressure moving at high speed. Such an assplosion is usually followed by gasping, groaning or blaspheming, followed by a horrendous, foul stench about 3 seconds later. It will usually spray the interior of the bowl with the liquid waste, which may often include undigested bits of food such as okra, peanuts or sesame seeds.

Causes horrible intestinal contractions, speeding on the highway, perspiring, fervent praying and fumbling with keys to get inside to the john as you think "please let me get inside NOW, I swear this must be what childbirth is like". Tremendous relief immediately follows turning your toilet bowl into a radioactive disaster area.

Example:
"You all have after school d-hall--until the sick punk who sprayed explosive diarrhea on the bathroom radiator comes forward."


explosive diarrhea
A mostly liquid rectal discharge of significant force and velocity resulting in fetid splatter throughout the interior of the toilet bowl, almost always accompanied by an intensely foul, gaseous emission caused by the violent release of putrified colonic gas. The relief from bowel pressure experienced after such an assplosion is usually offset by the burning sensation of anal itching known in the vernacular as the "Ring of Fire."

Example:
A morning after bout of explosive diarrhea confirmed that Vietnamese cuisine wasn't for me.


explosive diarrhea
The worst thing to happen to you while you're at school when you have severe stomach cramping.

Think of a nuclear bomb stuck up your ass, and then it blasts off, leaving the toilet in ruins, and your ass in pieces, and then the aftermath of people's giggles as you leave the restroom, only to come back a minute later, shit blasting away at such an alarming rate that the sheer force has lifted you a foot off the toilet seat.
Example:
Damn, all that funny foreign food has started war with my digestive system and bowels.


explosive diarrhea
Its Sorta like a volcano, it builds up, then it begins to rumble. Then small streams of "warm" molten stuff begin to flow. then when you least expect it POW! It blows, and just like a volcano all the surrounding area is devastated
Example:
Once my friend tried to light his fart on fire, little did he know he had explosive diahrrea, all i have to say is we never saw him again...


explosive diarrhea
Very similar to normal diarrhea but fundamentally different at the same time. At first you may be minding your own business in the men's (or women's) room taking a leak like normal. While you stand there you blow of a few farts. So you proceed to try and blow off what feels like a really big powerfull fart (the most satisfying kind) and at first it is then you feel something hit the hole that shouldn't and you have to slam the door really quick. You quickly realize that you are no longer in need of a urinal (if you're a chick then you're pretty much set)so you find a stall and get ready. You know that it's liquid ass but you don't know the severity of the situation. You start to shit, as predicted it's diarrhea. Then it gets stronger and stronger. Soon you start farting between streams. The kind that reverberate in the bowl and echo in the room. Then you start farting during the streams effectively turning your ass into the most devastating form of shotgun known to man. Then the smell hits you and you think maybe you need a bucket too. This goes on for probably 15 minutes; courtesy flushing is a must. Even if you're not in public. The smell would peel the paint from the walls and burn the toilet paper that you hopefully have a costco package of standing by.

Finally it ends and you feel relieved. The cleanup is relatively easy. You may wanna dab some water on a piece of folded TP though to put out the fire. Find some mylanta and go on with your day.
Example:
Friend: "Hey what happened? I thought you just had to piss."
You: "Sorry, I got into a fight with my intestines. It ended in explosive diarrhea."
Friend: "Explo-"
You: "Don't ask..."


explosive diarrhea
A lower gastro-intestinal distubance that creates a dilemma in the afflicted: Do I need a bucket of water or a shotgun?....Is that a fireball or a mountain lion coming out of my ass?
Example:
Sweetie, Quick! Bring me a drop cloth..I have explosive diarrhea.


explosive diarrhea
Similar to projectile vomit, except from the anus. Normally explosive diarrhea is bile and orange juice, accompanied by chunks of scratchy objects ranging in size from a pebble to however big your ass can stretch, and unexpected volumes of fart which do a marvelous job of dispersing said liquid and chunks. Explosive diarrhea is deceptive; leaving the top of the lid virtually unharmed, yet devastating the underside.
Example:
Someone had explosive diarrhea at ihop


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