soggy pillow
Article of linen sewed by one's grandmother with which inadequate kissers practice necking because they lack the balls to go out and get some real world experience.
Example:
Said Doug, "Gee, as long as I have a soggy pillow in my bed, I'll never get to do the horizontal tango!"
Said Doug, "Gee, as long as I have a soggy pillow in my bed, I'll never get to do the horizontal tango!"