the Avocado

A horrible horrible cunt from Wedmore



avocado
An indisputably awesome food that is versatile, healthy, and manly. Useful in salads, Mexican food, baked potatoes, sex, omelettes, and even popcorn. Also invaluable in a vegetarian/vegan diet. 95 percent of avocados grown in the US come from California.

Should be considered the most MANLY FOOD EVER due to these facts:

At one point, it was also known as the alligator pear. Your penis is already jealous.

Its name is derived from the Aztec word for testicle.

A small avocado provides one's body with more usable protein than a huge steak because the proteins in the steak are deranged and mostly unavailable to the liver.

Women love it on their faces.

NOTE: Despite the belief of some, the so-called "popular belief" that the avocado is a vegetable is (1) not common at all, and (2) better applied to the more common and wimpy tomato. Hence, the use of the term "avocado" to describe a homosexual who appears heterosexual is misplaced and not warranted.
Example:
Actually, us vegans get MORE protein. Props to avocados.

You made guacamole?! I love you!


avocado
Avocado is a delicious fruit, sometimes confused for a vegetable, but definitely a fruit. It comes with its own handy bio-degradable packaging, so no need to wrap it in plastic. Under no circumstances should it ever be cooked. This is a direct order from heaven. It is perfect as it is and cooking it is a literal sin and a crime against humanity. Enjoy uncooked, raw, cold, fresh from the tree or not warm.
Example:
"This avocado is cooked burn this place down!"


Avocado
Used to describe a person, particularly a man, who is socially construed as straight by those around him/her, but in actuality is gay. Someone who goes undected on the gaydar spectrum. Thick, deceptive skin on outside, but a fruit on the inside. Based on the avocado being widely misnomered as a vegetable, when it is indeed a fruit.
Example:
Amber: I had no idea that Jerry was gay! He seems so...so... hetero!

Omar: Yeah. Everyone thinks that. He's an avocado.


Avocado
when a vegetarian gives up on plants and goes back to eating meat
or when someone tries to lay off of healthy food

(its like going commando with vegetables
instead of underwear.)
Example:
Jose-hey bob you hear what happened to john?
bob-yeah i hear hes going avocado


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