Flex Tape

The greatest fucking invention man has ever made or thought of! It is undoubtedly the furthest we, as homosapiens, have come and it is possibly going to revolutionise this world.It can solve any problem (not including your love life but still shown to have better results than placebo)It's basically ductape but 10000% more badass and it's black so you know it'll be fun to play with



Flex Tape
Basically God, if you haven’t already heard of this stuff, climb out from under that boat that was sawed in half and put back together and go get some!

Flex Tape does basically anything you can think of!
Bee Hive on your gutter? BOOM! Flex Tape!
Want to stop peeing the bed? BOOM! Flex Tape! (Have fun getting that shit off)
Professional Waxing too expensive? BOOM! Flex Tape!
Significant other or other person won’t shut up? BOOM! Flex Tape
Example:
I sawed this boat in half, and repaired it using only Flex Tape!”~ Phil Swift


Flex Tape
1; An as-seen-on-tv tape product, claiming to be able to fix any crack, hole, leak, or thing in general. It can also be used to seal up the bottle because Grandpa's been hitting it too hard.

2; Jesus

3; A worldwide phenomenon started by youtuber Jontron, where he answers the question: What is flex tape? He explains, through strenuous research, that flex tape is, in fact, a holy product that can fix anything, even stopping your IV or blood bag from leaking onto your computer.
Example:
1; "Just to prove the power of Flex Tape, I sawed this boat in half,"

2; "Going to church on Sunday to pray to Flex Tape."

3; "This is Josephi Krakowski, here with Flex Tape,"

"100% Improved Product,"


Flex Tape
A creation by the almighty god Phil Swift who can patch, bond, seal, and repair with no effort at all. It is his gift to us mortals to repair our foolish mistakes. Don’t try making it at home, because it is a creation by a GOD, not a HUMAN. Only the most worthy people are chosen to own it. Without Flex Tape, we would not exist.
Example:
John: “Phil Swift appeared in front of me and gave me a roll of Flex Tape yesterday!”
Caden: “You should be glad, he has chosen you as a worthy bearer of that supernatural gift.


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