IB
The epitome of cruel and unusual torture, inflicted on young people between the ages of fifteen and eighteen, in which all moral and ethical codes are violated. This program, known formally as the
International Baccalaureate, is designed to make these teenagers suffer as much as they can over the span of two years. The more miserable the students are, the more bonus points the IB gurus gain, and the more money is incremented int heir salaries. The instructors are cruel, uninterested in the well-being of the students; the coordinators are merciless in the strive to boost the
GPA's of the students as high as they can go; the students themselves are nervous wrecks. Time is not the friend of these poor children, as they are not allowed any spare minutes to do normal activities other teenagers their ages do (i.e. going to the movies, parties, drinking, or attending other social events). They are shielded from the world in their little bubble of
TOK, Chemistry, Biology, Photo, Psychology, American History, English, Spanish, French,German, Calculus, Physics, and
MLA/
APA in-text and extra
textual citations. They have a notorious reputation to take illicit drugs in order to maintain concentration and memory. (otherwise known as potheads.) They also have a glorious reputation of being cheaters and
liers. IB is in its simplest form a very accurate representation of Hell on Earth. It deprives its students of sleep, food, fun, rest, relaxation, and most of all, happiness and sanity. If an individual is able to complete the rigorous courses and receive their
diploma,
conserve their sanity, stay alive to receive said diploma, or abstain from committing murder or personal physical
mutations, they shall be dubbed The Honorable One by the IB gods in Cardiff, Whales.
IB
by Loyal Utah Kid on Aug 15, 2010 17:44:27
The International Baccalaureate Diploma Programme (IB) is an education programme that genetically modifies its students to live without basic requirements and teaches the aesthetically pleasing art of Bullshit, through its ultimate arsenal of ToK,
Extended Essay and
CAS.
ToK is an extension of Language A1 class, where students are taught how to bullshit on for 10 pages about whether a
pen is a pen or a pencil. The Extended Essay is a benchmark for a students' brainwashing stage. The instructions clearly states students choose a topic of their interest. Successful
IB students should not have any interest by this stage. People who still have interest to write about will get an E, and therefore fail the IB. CAS is as close as students get to breathing fresh air and seeing flesh objects. In CAS, students donate their expendable blood, because its the least time consuming service they can offer without compromising
study time. IB students also don't have time to make friends. Friends are ompetitors.
At the end of the 2 year IB course. Those who get above a 24 are successfully genetically modified, those who get below 24 do not fullfill the requirements and are obsolete.
Example:
Nurse: You again? This must be the 5th time you'v come here to
donate blood
IB student: Yes it is. I need 50 service hours for IB.
Nurse: You need time for your blood cells...
IB student: Women I don't have time! There are
couple more IB students lined up outside all for the same good CAS cause. Please be understanding
Nurse: I simply cannot allow you to...
IB student: The 45th student, please don't let him donate blood. He pulled out my USB without safety removal and he took advantage of shared wireless network to download my EE as i was writing it.
Nurse: Your what?
IB Student: Oh,
Extended Essay, its just 4000 words of bullshit, much of it borrowed from a thesaurus.
IB
by Pathetic IB student on Sep 02, 2008 02:43:29
International Baccalaureate Program, a high school program for exceptionally gifted students, designed to transform once intelligent creative students into conformists of an international curriculum. This program is known for causing ridiculously high stress levels, mutual hatred and competition amongst it's students, repeated mental breakdowns,
bloodshed, lack of a social life, and the mastery of bullshitting your way through things.
IB students are typically extremely masochistic and rarely sleep. It is also known to have made students who once felt quite smart to feel quite stupid, thus greatly lowering their self-esteems.
Another name for IB is hell.
Example:
Non-IB student: Hey you want to go hang out tonight?
IB student: Sorry, I can't. I have a chemistry formal report due tomorrow, I have to read about 100 pages for biology, read an entire Shakespeare play, write a
research paper about
Stalin, do an entire chapter of calculus, and volunteer for 8 hours too.
Non-IB student: Damn.
IB
by awesomeib on Oct 22, 2011 10:06:43
A dangerously fatal disease whose side effects include but are not limited to: A soulless existence, insomnia due to the persistent feeling of not having completely finished all work, a "
brain-dead" state, a shattered self-esteem, a falsified interest in life as a result of
TOK, an endless cycle of procrastination,
which left untreated could lead to mental instability, insanity, or fatality.
Example:
"It was nice knowing
Sujen," says Speaker 1
"The IB got the best of him...he fought so valiantly" says speaker 2
"He shall not be forgotten. May he rest in peace, and let the IB be
eradicated before more
perish" says speaker 3.
IB
by Celeste457 on Jan 05, 2007 07:32:37
A maleveloent
programme whose objective is to destroy the race smart students . To go about this, the programme has many methods. The first method is to give
superfluous homework. This tactic is used so that the student becomes too overwhelmed with homework that their brains fry into an abyss of nothingness. The second method consists of putting a burden of a 20 ton "backpack" on the students back, making them physically weak and unable to support their own body. Often, during this stage, the student complains of back problems and the development of
spinal injury. The third method is to
deprive the student of his/her sleep. This makes the students do poorly on their tests and final evaluations. The fourth method, the most evil, is that the program tricks its students into beleiving that they will get into any university they try for. Unfortunatley, several students fall for this. Lastly, to renforce the destruction of the smart, the program usually consists of biased teachers, overacheiving robots DISGUISED as
IB students, 150
CAS hours to complete, mind-abolishing essays and useless confusing subjects like
TOK.
IB
by the in gods can burn in hell on Nov 26, 2019 04:49:06
if you are reading this definition you clearly already know what the ib is and you should get off the internet and start working because you have your tok, ee,
ioc,
iop, maths ia all due in -4 days and you promised you would spend the weekend helping out with global warming for cas. you haven’t even started your 27th econ ia, and you’re redoing your tok presentation next week so you i’m
praying for you.
Example:
a-level student: i’ve already got offers from my top 5
unis! i dont even need to work for the rest of the year
ib student: *busy researching dark magic for their ee and also in hopes that they can use it to pass*